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Other Body Dysmorphia


New Here
Does anybody find it hard to look at their body in any way without identity all your flaws? I find I’m a mama bear and everyone says I should care for myself the way I do for others. I don’t see the same value I’m myself but wish I did

A trick I learned a 1,000 years ago? Find ONE thing you like.

It can be a different thing every day, or the same thing every day, or a combo of past/new likes. But? Find 1.
Yep. It comes and goes in how big an issue this is. If really bad, I can't look at my whole face when doing my make up. Most days I have messages in my head about how hateful my body is.
But also, I have been able to shift a lot of things. A big trigger was thinking my body was my mum's and I couldn't look at mine without thinking it was hers/she owned it. That has nearly entirely gone.
Another thing that's totally gone is hating my genitals and blaming them. I now see them as normal and perfectly ok.

When I exercise I feel much better about my body. But the challenge is getting to exercise when hating my body because I have messages in my head saying exercising exposes my body to the people in the gym and on the streets.

What I find works, when in a better head space, is telling the thoughts to go away and replacing them with something else.

I also suppose it's learning about self value and self love? If we don't have our bodies, we're not alive.
hello dile. welcome to the forum. sorry for what brings you here but glad you are here.

in my moments of deepest despair, i'm not sure i am even aware that i have a body. i'm just a gnasty canker sore on the body of life. i've wondered if my tendency to starve myself was born of a desire to disappear. i just the wicked witch of the west responding to a drop of water. "i'm melting. . ."
I find I’m a mama bear and everyone says I should care for myself the way I do for others. I don’t see the same value I’m myself but wish I did
this boney mama bear will do for her cubs what she will not do for herself. my first glimmer of finding value in self-care came by tacking on the addendum that my cubs deserve a healthy caregiver. take care of their nursery equipment.

but that is me and every case is unique. . .

steadying support while you sort your own case. welcome aboard. you are not alone.
Yup, I spend hours obsessing.
Some days I’ll be absolutely convinced I look like a spaghetti noodle, and other days I think I look like a man and need to stop weight lifting.

At the moment, it’s mostly that I need to cut weight again, because I am feeling a bit big for my liking.

I try and fact check myself. What can I find other than looking in the mirror as an objective way to measure my body? Perhaps that’s how far/fast I can run, how much I can bench, how my clothes feel, rather than *omg I look like a whale I’m not eating for a week*
Very much so. For most of my life. My face, my ears, backside, front side, feet, legs.....pretty much all of it. Hate mirrors. Hate having my photo taken. Hate seeing myself in photos. T asked me the other day if there was anything physical about myself that I liked. I said years ago I think I thought my neck was "ok". But at 53 that's a lost cause as well. I've kind of come to terms with the fact that I'm just not an attractive person. And I know that because I've been diagnosed with Body Dysmiorphia and that's this is supposed to explain it. But it doesn't really change anything about how I see myself. This will likely be one of the few arguments my T will not win with me. I know what I see in the mirror. To me that reflection is just the reality of what I look like.