So how is this not healing? I am having trouble understanding why I was told that this is not healthy.
There's a difference between stopping one thing
now, and stopping everything forever.
Being able to stop? Is a learned skill in and of itself. To recognize when you're spinning yourself up out of control,
before you freak out. To be able to back away, even after you've freaked out.
It's not healthy to work yourself up into a state where you're abusing yourself.
I know you work with kids, so try thinking of it that way for a moment. When a kid is trying to accomplish something, but are having a meltdown over it, so they're not only
not accomplishing what they set out to do, but are damaging themselves & things around them, is that healthy? ((From a toddler beating the hell out of a VCR with a tape they can't make fit in the slot, to a highschool kid about to throw -or even throwing- a musical instrument across the room -or in tears sobbing about how they'll
never be able to play, they just suck, they're awful, they should never <insert escalating beating themselves up & tearing themselves down here>. )) Do you encourage that? Or do you have them take a break? You have them stop, right? Does that mean never play music again? No. Does that mean music is unhealthy? No. Some of the behaviors may be unhealthy, though. Processing trauma? Is different from excoriating yourself with trauma. Investigation is different from obsession.
To be music? A piece needs more than just notes, right? The rests are as important as the notes. Pianissimo isn't less important than crescendo, just because it's quieter. Timing matters. Order matters. "Healthy" is much the same.
