I'm wondering if anyone on here from the UK can offer me tips on my current situation. I'm about 4.5 months pregnant and the father is a UK citizen living in London. He has threatened me repeatedly and most recently said that if i sue for child support or contact his mother about the baby he will email a certain video we made to my relatives, co-workers, etc. I'm fairly certain this is extortion in most Western countries and can be prosecuted, but I'm wondering if anyone on here has any ideas? I know that in some places you can get a restraining order to stop someone from publishing certain things to prevent it from happening at all, so I am wondering if the UK has a mechanism for this. I've searched online but can't find anything concrete and I'm still trying to find a lawyer who offers free consultations.
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Child Support And Other Stuff In Uk
- Post starter Casey_03
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barefoot
Diamond Member
Sorry to hear that you're in this position - sounds like a horrible situation.
"Revenge porn" (apologies for the blunt phrase!) is now illegal in the UK.
If you search for Criminal Justice and Court Act 2015, it's included in that. It makes it an offence for someone to disclose a private sexual film or photo:
- without the consent of someone who appears in the film/photo
- with the intention of causing that person distress
It's a pretty new law (April 2015) so there's presumably not much precedent. But at least it looks like there is something in the law here that might help you - especially if you have any evidence (messages etc) of his threats to disclose the video if you don't do as he says.
Good luck - he sounds like a total shit!
"Revenge porn" (apologies for the blunt phrase!) is now illegal in the UK.
If you search for Criminal Justice and Court Act 2015, it's included in that. It makes it an offence for someone to disclose a private sexual film or photo:
- without the consent of someone who appears in the film/photo
- with the intention of causing that person distress
It's a pretty new law (April 2015) so there's presumably not much precedent. But at least it looks like there is something in the law here that might help you - especially if you have any evidence (messages etc) of his threats to disclose the video if you don't do as he says.
Good luck - he sounds like a total shit!
Friday
Sponsor
Something quirky to know about the UK Law -in addition to RevengePorn- is that, unlike America, they have Grandparental Rights.
Meaning if you tell his mother? His parents can fight for custody... And in nearly all cases at least partial custody is granted, and sometimes sole custody. Even partial custody often also restricts the child from leaving the country... Especially if he parents claim you're a flight risk... As you are by definition (as you're not a UK citizen). I know a fair number of American moms who've been caught up in this, because it's not a normal thing to even consider over here, where grandparents have no legal rights.
His terror over you telling his mom (and how he links that to child support each time)? Makes me think his parents would immediately file for their grand parental rights, they don't even have to be UK citizens, he is & it's his child... Which would place him squarely on the hook for child support, even if he never saw his child, ever.
Unless you would consider giving up your baby to these people? Or being stuck in the UK for the next 16-18 years, much of that time with no work permit? (also unlike the US, having a British child does not confer the right to citizenship, nor the right to work) Or having to live in a country with no extradition treaty for kidnapping. I know the US doesn't have a treaty with Albania & a few other Balkan states, not sure about the UK. We definitely have a US/UK treaty. Denying a British grandparent there, will get you arrested here. Or anywhere else the UK holds that particular treaty with. Yes it's your child, it's still considered kidnapping if there is court ordered visitation &/or custody.). I would tread very cautiously about whom you tell what to.
Meaning if you tell his mother? His parents can fight for custody... And in nearly all cases at least partial custody is granted, and sometimes sole custody. Even partial custody often also restricts the child from leaving the country... Especially if he parents claim you're a flight risk... As you are by definition (as you're not a UK citizen). I know a fair number of American moms who've been caught up in this, because it's not a normal thing to even consider over here, where grandparents have no legal rights.
His terror over you telling his mom (and how he links that to child support each time)? Makes me think his parents would immediately file for their grand parental rights, they don't even have to be UK citizens, he is & it's his child... Which would place him squarely on the hook for child support, even if he never saw his child, ever.
Unless you would consider giving up your baby to these people? Or being stuck in the UK for the next 16-18 years, much of that time with no work permit? (also unlike the US, having a British child does not confer the right to citizenship, nor the right to work) Or having to live in a country with no extradition treaty for kidnapping. I know the US doesn't have a treaty with Albania & a few other Balkan states, not sure about the UK. We definitely have a US/UK treaty. Denying a British grandparent there, will get you arrested here. Or anywhere else the UK holds that particular treaty with. Yes it's your child, it's still considered kidnapping if there is court ordered visitation &/or custody.). I would tread very cautiously about whom you tell what to.
- Post starter
- #4
@FridayJones Thanks, I'm trying to consult with a lawyer on this now but am trying to get a more solid understanding before I do, so I know exactly what to ask. So you mean that even though I live in Ukraine and the baby will be born here, his mother could theoretically have a court order me to bring her the child for consistent visits? and if i don't, i'd be extradited?
Friday
Sponsor
Yep.
- Post starter
- #6
I don't know if that is still the case. Everything I'm reading now on legal forums says this was changed fairly recently and the grandparents would need to get my permission in order to do this unless they can prove i'm an unfit mother. Apparently they'd have to apply for a Contact Order through a court and even then, if I ignore it, there's nothing the courts can do. At least, that is according to one British law firm.
"The Law
Step-parents who have lived as part of a family for three years were given the right to apply for contact under the Children Act 1989, but the same rights were not afforded to grandparents. Grandparents, therefore, have had to apply to the courts just to ask permission to make a request for some sort of contact. This can be a protracted and expensive process.
It was thought that grandparents would be given legal rights to maintain contact with their grandchildren, to help recognise the important role they play. Unfortunately, however, this plan does not seem to have come into fruition."
I hope this is accurate, though I see your point that there are all sorts of ways this could play out, and not in my favor. I guess I will find out when I pay for the consultation what is best. Ugh.
"The Law
Step-parents who have lived as part of a family for three years were given the right to apply for contact under the Children Act 1989, but the same rights were not afforded to grandparents. Grandparents, therefore, have had to apply to the courts just to ask permission to make a request for some sort of contact. This can be a protracted and expensive process.
It was thought that grandparents would be given legal rights to maintain contact with their grandchildren, to help recognise the important role they play. Unfortunately, however, this plan does not seem to have come into fruition."
I hope this is accurate, though I see your point that there are all sorts of ways this could play out, and not in my favor. I guess I will find out when I pay for the consultation what is best. Ugh.
digger
Sponsor
Not an expert, but - Grandparents don't have automatic rights in the UK. They can apply to the courts for it though. Usually I think access is more likely to be granted where there is already an established bond between the grandchild and grandparents. Applying to the courts is not a guarantee of being granted rights.
Speaking to a lawyer is probably your best option with regard working out the odds on that one.
Speaking to a lawyer is probably your best option with regard working out the odds on that one.
Friday
Sponsor
<deleting several paragraphs because international custody disputes is a bit of a thing for me>
Just, clearly, making sure they specialize in international law.
^^^^ This. Smartest move you can make. ^^^^ :D
Just, clearly, making sure they specialize in international law.
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