Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

[littleoc]

Wish I could just pack. I am so upset that it's this hard to just save something

 

[gorgonzola]

I hope bird lady gets back to you soon.

But anyway may not be able to update on that reliably in I lose access to Internet/phone so. Just try not to worry idk

That's going to be difficult!

 

[littleoc]

Managed to pack a bit. Am making lists of tasks to be done so I can just pick one. It's still very difficult but at least I'm just picking one task at a time

 

[littleoc]

My sister for some reason is freaking out now and says I HAVE to keep the House at all costs, even if it means taking out a mortgage on it... The lack of support is fine in the face of losing a childhood home and also our suddenly dead mom's house, but the pressure is over the line.

She's always had anxiety issues and hasn't been getting therapy for it. I'm at a point where I've already re-homed animals and such, and don't want to deal with the house anymore, nor live with my brother. Like, ship's sailed...

Shocked she called me to say I have to do something because she is freaked out. I get that she's freaked out, especially because she also can't take in our brother and uh. etc.

I'm in a doctor office rn so not going into detail but. Grrr

 

[littleoc]

I told her I've exhausted every option I had available that I could afford. My brother didn't pay any rent and she and I are both in debt for it. how would I afford a mortgage, and why would I make my first home this piece of shit house at this point...?

Maybe will ask the bank but seriously, what the heck

 

[Freida]

Even just researching taking on a mortgage is going to be stressful - especially if you are doing it for someone else's benefit.

You have already arranged all of the things to get you into the hosptial and to finally get care for you. You need that time to rest and recover from all you've been thru, with people who can help you. Really help you.

If your sister wants the house she can take out a mortgage and let you rent from her - after! you get the help you need. This hospital journey has been a long process, please don't let someone who shows up at the last minute to make demands derail you

 

[littleoc]

I check online calculators and they suggest I can afford $4,000 of house lmao

Thanks, I agree. It's really unfortunate that all of this has happened and I really hope my brother finds something. Don't know why she wants to save him and not me, but not even worried about that part tbh. Maybe because he's my mom's baby (youngest)

Idk. I've already been mad she was freaking out about how the house loss will affect her grief and not at all about how I've had to completely give up everything.

I'm trying so hard to just be thankful she showed any concern because she didn't have to. Aka I'm aware most people can't mentally handle all of this and I do not want to judge the desperate reactions of people, but goodness I think if I can figure this out when it's this dire and this bad

Hope that makes sense

 

[littleoc]

Also dealing with my dad at the same time. And packing. And everything else

 

[littleoc]

This house sucks to live in also to be honest

 

[littleoc]

Not happy at all about my family f*cking me over, don't get me wrong. And I'm not blaming them either. I'm just saying it's not worth trying to save at this point. It's far too late