Constant irritability and short fuse

[Hanala]

I live in a dorm (a huge house with 20-30 other girls) and I am having a huge uptick in symptoms and PTSD problems. I think it's because I am going to be finally going to therapy and trying to work on the trauma. But I am literally a tickin time bomb all the time and whomever gets in the way/ bugs me gets my rage unleashed on them whether they deserve it or not.

I am not this angry, rude person. I am not a bad person. But between the lack of sleep (horrific nightmares) and the hyper vigilance/anxiety I have such a short fuse. I try to breathe and count to 5 and not engage and remove myself from the situation if I can but I still keep lashing out. I think it's a combo of a lot of things. And I'm just tired of feeling like I'm constantly being picked apart and then snapping and then feeling bad.

Anyone have any ideas?

 

[EveHarrington]

:hug:

Do you get much alone time?

I know I'm SUPER irritable if I don't have alone time where I can recharge.

 

[Hanala]

:hug:

Do you get much alone time?

I know I'm SUPER irritable if I don't have alone time where...

The truth is probably not. I am living in a dorm (a huge house with 30girls) where I live and go to school and spend all my time with the same people which is hard for me. I am an extreme introvert by nature in terms of needing a lot of alone time and I don't always get it. I've started having music and headphones with me almost constantly so I can disengage when I need to. I get extremely overstimulated very easily and that makes me very irritable. My roommate is amazing and knows what's flying and she mentioned that I really need to learn to say "no" when people ask me to do things. I'm eating up all my alone/'me time' with extra tasks I don't want to do. Which obviously adds to the irritability.

 

[Deleted member 37605]

Would it possible to let all the girls know you suffered through a trauma and you need their understanding? Or is that just too hard for you?

 

[Hanala]

My dorm mom knows and my roommate knows (and is amazing). But I for sure wouldn't share with all of them. It's not in my nature anyway but it's also something that a bunch of them wouldn't be sensitive to. A few of them are honestly some of the most abrasive people I have ever met. They are working on their own personality defects as well

 

[lymphomamama]

Similar, but different lol... I live with my husband and two adult children. Then there's their friends. No space no real privacy and no time alone. Seems like a little thing but my earbuds can block out the world when I am stressing and the house is full of people. I use some stress releasing stuff, you know, meditation, relaxation, coached stuff too like focused breathing exercises. It's my little world all alone in my head with my eyes closed.

 

[Hanala]

^ I think sometimes I just need to be more unapologetic about excusing myself and going to get alone time. Because everyone already thinks I'm a jerk if I'm zoned out around them or making angry stress comments because I'm overstimulated. Better to just be elsewhere if I need to.