Dealing with family and friends who are extremely racist

[Deleted member 37868]

k I’m a bleeding heart liberal let’s just get that out there. That said I can accept opposing or differing beliefs, I can be friends with a conservative or republican because at the end of the day we are all humans, I can also very calmly debate someone, and I don’t even agree with all liberal ideology I’m a free thinker with a big heart. My family and friends in Germany are sending me just straight up neo nazi vids, there’s no room for nuance or logic, and the talking points are eerily similar to those used pre Hitlers rise to power. My aunt told me once cake wanted to run over little Syrian kids in her car, I’m not even kidding. I stay calm but I cannot handle it these idiots are talking about the Muslim rapists and Our GERMAN family is filled with pedophiles and rapists, one of which raped me. There are good ppl, evil ppl and all different kinds in between on a continuum. Mass immigration without proper procedures in place and integration systems in place is a problem. But they are hate filled idiots who are completely missing the irony of the situation. I’m mad, I wanted to rant on here so I don’t say anything in anger to one of them. If I’m not calm and logical I feel weak, so I usually put off replying until I’ve collected my thoughts.

Lol not sure why the word cake is in one of my sentences.

 

[Anarchy]

Just a thought,
You could post that you are reading any or even every one of the many excellent critical counters to national socialist racism.
Hayek's "The Road to Serfdom"
Flynn's "as we go marching"
Mises' "omnipotent government"
Röpke's many criticisms of the mid twentieth century crisis in European civilization...

It will probably go straight over the top of their heads, because racists tend not to be very deep thinkers, but you might tempt someone into looking and thinking a little bit deeper.

 

[Deleted member 37868]

Omg now I’m going to get those books. I only have about 3 thousand text books to read as is. Good tip though, also kind of funny.

 

[Anarchy]

Most can be downloaded free, there might even be audio book versions.

 

[Deleted member 541]

I can’t stand bigots. I don’t know how you cope with this in your own family.....

 

[Ronin]

I wouldn't talk with gnatsies and since one can't shoot them either, I'd just withdraw to safety & cut all contact.

But that's just me and things in existence I don't approve of in that existence.

Anarchy has a more dignified response to this one, though.

 

[dulcia]

I've got some family members like this but it's more nuanced with them, as opposed to in your face. I respond with absolute silence. Make a joke? Not a word. Bring up something controversial? Not a word. I've tried reasoning or arguing in the past and it's been unsuccessful -- we've never been able to agree. But honestly, it seems like a big part of it might be the reaction for them. So by taking away the reaction, it seems almost as if I'm taking the fun out of it for them.

 

[Supervixn]

Sorry you're dealing with this. Stay strong. You know you're right. I'd limit conversation

 

[Deleted member 37868]

I've got some family members like this but it's more nuanced with them, as opposed to in your face. I re...

That is very true, and it probably minimizes conflict. I’m such an idealist though, and I really want to change ppls minds, or at least appeal to their hearts, it’s difficult for me to accept that it’s hopeless, cause big picture; we are doomed then.

 

[Deleted member 40995]

I have dealt with this in my family too. My mother is Native American and my father and his family were always very racist towards us and her side of the family because of it. Dad's mom referred to her grandchildren as her babies and referred to me as "the inj*n", always was talking about my hair and how different it was (all her family have the blonde hair, I have very dark hair) teling me to go brush it every few minutes because I looked like a dirty savage etc. Dad always said I was just "another one of those inj*ns" and was always making comments, he hated how my eyes looked and made comments often about them (they are almond and I won't go into his comments here, they don't deserve to be repeated :bag:)
As far as dealing with it I generally just won't reply. I know my father was only trying to get a reaction from me, so I wouldn't give it to him, and that generally made him stop. With Dad's mother, she wasn't doing it to make me mad she just honestly didn't like that about us so the best way dealing with her was to change the subject, just let it roll off your back and ignore it and change the subject. Or, depending on the person poke them back a little :p Dad's mother and I eventually got to the point where if she started talking about my hair, I'd tease her about something too, just lightening the mood with her a bit and getting her off the topic :) Couldn't do that with some of his other relatives with them I just smile and change the subject- ignorant comments don't deserve to take your time and thoughts, they don't mean a thing if you don't let them get to you :hug: