Dealing With Feeling Like I'm Being Targeted....

[saffy]

Poor kids growing up with chav scum parents like that. Give it 10 years they will probably be on here too.

Neighbours can be real tw*ts and so engrossed in their unsophisticated ways they actually forget how to be a decent human being. People like this do not care you are being annoyed by their noise. They do not care that their kids run around being little ar*holes either. But they will still defend their action and pass the blame. They are not decent enough to accept they have been loud or to apologise for their actions, otherwise they would be more courteous in the first place.

I would work on getting them evicted as this will not stop, unfortunately for you. I think they would behave like this wherever they lived so don't take it personally.

Well done though for going up there are telling them off. Good for you.

best wishes
Saffy :)

 

[Tribulations]

Saffy I totally agree, I feel so bad for those kids. The mother locks them up in that apartment all day, and when they are outside she isn't anywhere around. She stays inside when the kids are outside, the girl is 4 and the boy is around 7 or 8. This isn't the best neighborhood either, and the little girl has already almost gotten hit by a car in the complex. Even after all this went down, we kept warning about the kids screen in the window being popped out. Why you ask? Well because I don't think I couldn't in good conscious. What if the little girl falls out the window watching for daddy to come home? She pushes on that screen waiting for her dad to come home. We were told to not say anything anymore, and her screen is popped out again. I guess my question is, is how can you not notice your child's screen in their bedroom window being popped out that far?!

Another incident the mother was gone, the boy came home and was locked out of the apartment. He was sitting there for like 2 hours just waiting. The parents who are at least 10 years older than us are acting 10 years younger than us. The dad had the balls to ask what he should do? He said "What do you want me to do? Lock my daughter in her room on her bed?" or "what do you want me to do kill my daughter?".

First off that is not for me to figure out, secondly none of the children I have helped raised or raised acted like that. How about spending time with your kids instead of being on an ipad or drinking beer and watching tv? That's what parks are designed for, that's what kids outings are for. They didn't even think of clay and crayons we had to tell them that idea and the idea of teaching the kids to ride a bike. Pardon the swearing but wtf man? Seriously? The mom doesn't have a job, so her job is being a home maker and she doesn't even do that.

Now because the owner doesn't acknowledge ptsd let alone know what it is and the parents are hiding behind thier kids, she is trying to evict us. I think she knows she screwed up, so I think she's trying to cover her tracks. I mean she does have like 3 to 5 alias and her bbb profile is under a company hidden under another company. I am pretty sure the only reason her bbb profile reads no complaints in the past 36 months is because no one knows that company exists.

I just wish people were more considerate. When we first went up there we asked if we were being too loud because at first we thought it was retaliation for us being too loud. Then we realized we were quiet as mice and they're just loud and inconsiderate.

They now do it when I am alone, so they're playing games. It's petty and pathetic, how much of a pos can you be to do that to someone who has already been through so much?

So now we are basically being ganged up on by the owner and them and one of the apartment staff. The owner knows about my anxiety she knows that knocks on the door screw with me, and she told the maintenance guy to knock before he taped the notice on our door.

The 2 lawyers we talked to only do landlords not tenant defense. Why is it so hard to find a tenant defense for those of us with this? *Sigh* I guess the way I see it is it's 2013, why is there still no defense for people who honest to god need it?

End rant.

 

[saffy]

Well on the other side when you are gone to a better home they will still be living their shit lives.

Unfortunately for the kids nothing will be done until it is too late. :( Sad to say.

No one thanks someone interfering no matter how good the intentions are. Because they will then be admitting their faults. Those kids are being dragged up not bought up.

I hope you can give them all the message that people like them should be sterilized and loose what they have got to social services. make sure you call the authorities for child abuse when you go too.

People like this do not deserve kids at all.

I hope you can find a new place soon.

Best wishes
Saffy :)

 

[Tribulations]

Thanks Saffy. I do feel for the kids, the parents are ridiculous though. I agree with you, they shouldn't be able to bring in more lives into this world. Those kids are probably getting more attention now than they have ever gotten. That makes me really sad for them, because from experience it plain sucks to feel that way.

We are trying to get out of here, if we can find a lawyer that would be great. I don't think we should have had to pay rent when the apartment has been breaking the lease from the beginning. I think that we should be allowed to with hold rent and find a new a place. Just moving isn't likely unfortunately, we're not the wealthiest couple lol.

I just wish people would take accountability for their wrong doings, unrealistic but that's why it's a wish lol. On the hunt for a new lawyer I guess, the state bar charges 50 bucks to find one for you. Even that is rough on finances.

Thanks again though, it's nice when others understand.

 

[saffy]

HI Tribulations

Can you just give them notice of intention of leaving? I thought most would just expect a months notice? I am not from the USA.

Maybe you could bring the landlady to court under civil proceedings to claim the money you have already paid? WIthholding money might not go in your favour when it comes to court proceedings. I know it sucks.

Setting out all the wrong doings that have breached your tenancy agreement might hold water for you to proceed without the costly lawyers.

I can help you research if you would like some help.

Best wishes
Saffy :)

 

[Tribulations]

If we were to give a month's notice we would be breaking our end of the lease. Which really shouldn't matter since they already did, but unfortunately it does. We are locked into this lease until June I want to say. If we leave we don't get our deposit back. The reason we are looking for a lawyer is because she has a lawyer already.

According to my state you can withhold rent after giving a written 7 day notice. Having a lawyer at this point would probably be wise. I have searched for tenant/landlord lawyers online with the same result. Everyone does landlord but not tenant side. I would appreciate any help if you have the time or don't mind, thank you.

I'm just trying to work on fixing myself and getting to a place where I can actually heal. I miss making art and music, I feel so restricted here. I miss being able to go outside even if only on the back porch. The smell from the dumpster in the neighboring complex is so bad we can't use our porch. Plus the neighbors and their kids upstairs have made it a mess by dropping stuff through the wooden balcony slats. Not to mention kids like to fight back there, my partner actually had to prevent 2 boys beating up 1 boy this Saturday. The worst part is we were told this is one the best parts of the complex.

Thanks for understanding.

 

[saffy]

Hi Trib

I need to know your area to localise the research. I would go through tenant landlord dispute law. Mostly for what I have seen you are protected If you rent your home you are covered by the Residential Landlord-Tenant Act but I am not sure if this applies to every state in the USA.

I would recommend that you log every incident with dates and times and take photos of the mess and record any noise where possible.

In your tenancy agreement there must be a get out clause somewhere in the small print?

best wishes
Saffy :)

 

[Tribulations]

Thank you for the information Saffy, I will reply properly later. My partner came home to tell me she has strep, yaaaaay.... not lol. So I am off to play nanny and get her some hot tea with honey and lemon made. Poor thing, she takes care of me so it is my turn now.

Again thank you.

 

[Loveneverfails]

I'm glad you're looking into a fair housing investigation. It sounds like a classic case of harassment from your neighbors. The owner definitely IS trying to cover her tracks as that's how her job is handled if it can't be solved at the Property Manager or Regional/General Manager level. It's too bad the owner didn't back up her Property Manager, as the prop. mgr is the one who knows all of the tenants and what regular behavior on the property is. I know breaking the lease comes with astronomical fees and can damage your rental history if you leave on bad terms, but it might be something to look into and consider part of the damages in the suit you file with fair housing. I suggest you record the noise levels to be able to play for the person who handles your case(if you haven't already, I'm hoping I didn't miss anything in my skimming through).

As someone who has worked in the property management industry for five of the last seven years, I can tell you there is something worth looking into here. When it gets to the point that you're describing, it becomes a safety issue as some of the things they've done are offensive and harmful toward your emotional wellbeing and potentially unsafe practices for their children. I guarantee there is a section in your lease regarding that.

 

[therapybankrupt]

Unfortunately for the kids nothing will be done until it is too late. Sad to say.

.

We have a thing called Child Protective Services here in New York. You just call anynomously and report the danger the children are in and what is going on. You can help a child in danger before it is to late. Or at least try to get them the help they need. It may take a few calls but the more the better. Anyone can call as many times as the see fit if the neglect which is abuse continues. I hope Tribulations make the call in thier state.

TB

 

[Tribulations]

Saffy I will private message you my area. I have audio, video and written recordings. Not the best quality but you can definitely hear the bangs. They know good and well we have recordings too, because we offered to let them hear, and view them. They didn't want to listen or view them, neither did the owner.

Loveneverfails, thank you for giving your perspective. It makes me feel better to know someone in the profession finds this unacceptable too. Now I'm no saint either I did go up there and retaliate which was wrong and I take responsibility for that. I am not defending that the aggressive part of the action was right. However, in my defense this retaliation was after a lot of trying to do things cordially.

The problem is our rental history isn't good as is, credit is getting better but still not that great. So finding a place would be hard, really hard. What is worse is most of the houses for rent here are scams or are more than we can afford. I don't make a lot of income as I do freelance graphic design and odds n ends stuff where and when I can. So the majority if not almost all of our income falls on my partner. I don't leave the house much if at all, it really screws with me.

Therapybankrupt, I will do it after we leave. Everyone else who has a problem with it acts like they don't see it happening. So they will know it is us, as we have brought up those issues (nicely) with the father. The unfortunate thing is they will retaliate even more than now if they even think we had something to do with that. Retaliation for doing something right, man.... and people think I'm messed up?

They moved here from NY actually, so they're probably well aware. The father tried to use the "I'm from NY" thing to try and scare me. The messed up part is I'm not scared of him so much as scared of having my anxiety push me over the edge. I know I can black out, and I know the end result is not good. Blind rage isn't good with trained hands. I have gotten a better handle on this since my teen years, but it is extremely hard still as an adult.

The parents have improved slightly, because my girlfriend clearly told him in the last incident that "If she was really just trying to be an a-hole she would've called child protective services a long time ago.". Which is another reason they would probably know it is us, yeah she doesn't think sometimes when she is upset. Not a criticism, but an observation.

Sorry I didn't reply sooner you all, it has been a very rough day. Partner got sent home from work for strep, she checked my throat and I have white patches so I have strep, then we got a call her mother was in the hospital again. She had a TIA/mini stroke a week or so ago, got released, and had another major stroke. She has already had 3 major and 3 minor prior to these. This week keeps getting better and better, guess the saying is right when it rains it pours.

Thank you all for your support through this, I am sorry if I rant too much or ramble. Or if I'm overbearing, that isn't my intent. I really appreciate and value all of your feedback and advice. I hope all of you are having good days or nights where you are.

Sending much love and appreciation to everyone. *hugs*

 

[saffy]

We have a thing called Child Protective Services here in New York

Yes lets hope they are better than the ones in the UK then who always seem to get it wrong or are too late in cases that really need it. Although we do have a lot of parenting classes here. ;)

Maybe if the abuse is that bad you should call them as suggested Therapybankrupt has mentioned. However, mostly noise and letting them run riot is not normally seen as abuse, unfortunately.

I have PMd you with some more details on the legal side. I hope they help. :)

best wishes
Saffy