Dear provider, I’m not your hon, baby, or sweetie.

[siniang]

I don't even like this from my friend (who's from the south), but in a professional context I expect professionalism and this is not part of it. Where I come from, originally, it's not part of the language and those who use similar things (whether among friends or partners or whatnot) usually fit a certain prejudice box. I don't even like this sort of language from hubby (which he doesn't use anyways, thankfully). I know this may sound arrogant, but at least where we're from, it's a sign of education level.

And if it's in an area where it's not even common? Definitely patronizing because there is no reason to use it.

I've been "honey'ed" before by some costumer service rep (not common where we live now) and it made me really angry and feel like a little, insignificant child. I understand that it's just part of some cultures, but again, in professional contexts I expect a certain level of not only professionalism but more...how to say... commonality. Just how I expect a person in a clinic or a school or other professional context to not speak in the deepest dialect, regardless of whether or not they have to interact with people from other areas or not. To me it's a matter of manners and mutual respect.

I don't like the other extreme (Mrs. xyz) either, but I do prefer to be called by my name (anyone is always free to use my first name. Always).

But yeah, since this for me is so strongly correlated with education, I wouldn't only feel patronized when addressed like this in a professional context (particularly in a hospital setting), but even more so would start doubting their qualifications.

 

[Mach123]

Thank you sooo much for saying this ! I have a very hard time with anyone calling me "honey" (and "baby" or "sweetie") . I have had family members calling me this for years - then they hurt me. (grooming to the most degree) . When I hear it now, as an adult, I feel myself get very angry and it takes everything in me not to just scream at them. I just try and remember that they don't usually realize that they just did it.
I just want people to call me by my name.

Yes, I hate being called anything else.

Last time someone said, "we'll call you XYZ,"
I said, "You'll call me my phucking name."

But that doesn't fix it either lol.

 

[The Albatross]

Aw Christ… choose your offenses.