PerfectEmpire
Diamond Member
Hello everyone,
I am recently coming back after my last active period in October 2013. When I was last here, I was grieving the sudden loss of a friend and had just moved to a new town and started seeing a new therapist. I don't know how, but somehow I started getting a lot better, and fast.
Since I was last here...
I started going to yoga and meditating daily, took up an intense interest in Buddhism and Hinduism and yoga, and career stuff. I feel so completely safe in the world now (reasonable vigilance as opposed to hypervigilance), and open, and free, and have traveled abroad to places I never even dreamed I would go to, venturing beyond my own perceived possibilities many times over. It's wild. I will see about uploading some travel photos on my profile.
I'm in my 4th year of a PhD program that I previously thought I wasn't [good, smart, capable] enough for. I wear more colors and take in simple pleasures with real joy.
I feel more integrated, whole. Still in therapy, and grateful.
I'm back on here now because of an unhealthy relationship I was in, which I just ended because I could see it for what it was (that still didn't make it easy to let go, a work in progress for the time being). Despite the pain and suffering, and triggered flashbacks (for the first time in 4 years), this is a real success. I got out with my sense of reality in tact. Had I not been through everything I wrote about on here, and had I not done so much work on this forum, I wouldn't have recognised that I was in trouble and may have ended up in a worse position.
In general, I'm deeply happy, and my life is meaningful, and I have a number of people I can confide in and who confide in me, and I know I am desirable and good.
I am recently coming back after my last active period in October 2013. When I was last here, I was grieving the sudden loss of a friend and had just moved to a new town and started seeing a new therapist. I don't know how, but somehow I started getting a lot better, and fast.
Since I was last here...
I started going to yoga and meditating daily, took up an intense interest in Buddhism and Hinduism and yoga, and career stuff. I feel so completely safe in the world now (reasonable vigilance as opposed to hypervigilance), and open, and free, and have traveled abroad to places I never even dreamed I would go to, venturing beyond my own perceived possibilities many times over. It's wild. I will see about uploading some travel photos on my profile.
I'm in my 4th year of a PhD program that I previously thought I wasn't [good, smart, capable] enough for. I wear more colors and take in simple pleasures with real joy.
I feel more integrated, whole. Still in therapy, and grateful.
I'm back on here now because of an unhealthy relationship I was in, which I just ended because I could see it for what it was (that still didn't make it easy to let go, a work in progress for the time being). Despite the pain and suffering, and triggered flashbacks (for the first time in 4 years), this is a real success. I got out with my sense of reality in tact. Had I not been through everything I wrote about on here, and had I not done so much work on this forum, I wouldn't have recognised that I was in trouble and may have ended up in a worse position.
In general, I'm deeply happy, and my life is meaningful, and I have a number of people I can confide in and who confide in me, and I know I am desirable and good.
