Desperate - therapist disclosed csa to mother

[star76]

hi all,

I am 19 and away from home at university. On Wednesday I disclosed to my therapist that I had been sexually abused for years by yet another person. My therapists made a cast iron promise that this information would not go anywhere. I told her very bluntly that my mother wouldn't cope if she found out. Yesterday I found out that she had told my mother through a friend and had informed social services. I am distraught. I trusted her completely. I am seeing a psychiatrist privately at some point this week as its expected that I have BPD (obviously I suffer with PTSD) I feel so so abandoned, vulnerable and distressed. I (as a client) am always very punctual to appointments and have never missed one. I am meant to be seeing her on Wednesday but I am going to "ghost" her completely which i have insight into this and know is just my way to take revenge so to speak. I really need support and advice please.

thank you x

 

[Fiadh]

Do you mind me asking what country you are in? I can understand that you feel betrayed by your therapist if she promised you that this information would go no further, however she shouldn't have promised this. Because these rules can and do get broken if they feel that there is a risk to either yourself or to others, many places make you sign some contract or see a statement letting you know when it may occur. It's difficult to comment on your situation because you haven't shared exactly what has happened, but for her to go to social services- could it have been that who ever had abused you in the past may still have access to children or vulnerable adults?

Ultimately though this should have been discussed with you prior to a social services referral being made, with your consent and especially prior to contact being made with your mother- did you give consent for contact with next of kin? She should have explained that she was going to have to break confidentiality and explained the reasons why.

I don't think you should 'ghost' her though- I get that you want to let her know that she has hurt you and that you feel betrayed. But maybe think about taking a different approach- as you said you have always turned up to appointments on time and stuck to your end of bargain, don't change now. Turn up, it will be difficult, and explain to her the impact this has had on you- and then hopefully she can explain why she felt it's appropriate to let your mum know 'through a friend.' Get that explanation from her- then you are more in the know.

 

[Deleted member 541]

This is just wrong on so many levels. Your therapist had NO RIGHT to disclose this information to ANYONE!!!!!!!!!

 

[LuckiLee]

You're 19 a legal adult. They should never have disclosed this with anyone. I'm so sorry this is happening to you!

 

[littleoc]

She told someone who told someone else? If I interpreted that correctly?

 

[joeylittle]

They should never have disclosed this with anyone.

It really depends on the country. If the OP comes back and shares that info, more helpful advice could be given.

 

[Star76]

She told someone who told someone else? If I interpreted that correctly?

My t and mum share a mutual friend. my t and then mums friend told my mother

It really depends on the country. If the OP comes back and shares that info, more helpful advice co...

England (UK) the only legal thing therapist have to report is terrorisum and money laundering/ fraud. They have no legal obligation / right to disclose historic abuse

 

[Fiadh]

My t and mum share a mutual friend. my t and then mums friend told my mother

That's horrible and so wrong- sorry that she did this to you.

She sounds like she has no values when it comes to confidentiality- I'd report her.

 

[UnicornSightings]

Do you have her email address? Might be good to at least get some of your thoughts and feelings out if you don’t plan on seeing her again (I wouldn’t). I’m so very sorry this happened. I’d report her as well.

 

[Deleted member 541]

I too would report her. This is a real violation of your right to privacy. It’s also unethical on your therapist part to be blabbing her big mouth to ANYONE about ANY of her patients. This is just wrong and I’m so sorry that you have had to go through this.

 

[EveHarrington]

Report her.

In some countries no therapist can promise that your abuse won’t be reported ie USA because some things are out of their hands in terms of mandatory reporting laws.

But in your case.....so wrong. Telling a friend?!? She should have her license revoked!

 

[Deleted member 44579]

Hi @star76 I think if she broke confidentiality.. Then speak to here. Explain how you feel. I think reporting her doesn't necessarily give you answers.... And we all make mistakes... Or when going through difficult times in out