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Disabled With Ptsd, But Want To Be A Counseling Psychologist

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Lionheart, you did your due diligence and I admire you for that. People, various, suggested the same for me, but eh, nope. I am not, personally, able to deal with my stuff and do 7-11 or 12 hours of other peoples stuff without affecting me personally. I know this about myself even though by all accounts I may be suited. So I just didn't go there. I did something else to be of good use instead.
 
I think I might have been the person who introduced the idea of being a "wounded healer" to the discussion. I've been away from home for the weekend with very limited Internet access so am only now reading through the thread and find the direction the discussion has taken very interesting.

I fully understand the misgivings some have about anyone with any mental illness working in the area of mental health. There can be significant risks attached to someone who hasn't properly healed treating someone inappropriately or to someone having a relapse and either not recognising it, not acknowledging it or getting appropriate treatment themselves. I'm not minimising any of what has gone before - I hear the concern and the pain. I do however respectfully disagree that anyone who has experienced PTSD or any other mental illness should be automatically excluded from a career in mental health services, including counselling or therapy.

While I think this forum gives people the opportunity to connect with and get to know people with the same condition, to offer support and understanding, we only know what people choose to share of themselves and different people will use the forum for different things and thus will share different aspects of themselves to fit that purpose. Given this, I think it's a fairly difficult thing to say to anyone "you definitely should" or "you definitely shouldn't" do x, y or z; including making career choices. I write this knowing that I said I thought it was a fine idea for @Lionheart777 to look at studying towards becoming a therapist. I would still hold to this, mainly because I assume there are people in his life, who know him fully, see him coping day to day with his symptoms and who will see him day to day during an arduous course of training who are better placed to say whether he is sufficiently well to offer support to others. I don't think I'm sufficiently aware of his day to day health to suggest he shouldn't explore an area he has a keen interest in.

I use this place as somewhere to talk about the bits I struggle with, the symptoms that I know about, that I have strategies for managing and which from time to time catch me unawares. I use it to talk about how damned difficult the therapeutic process is, how vulnerable I feel in that space and how hard I work to overcome that. There are many facets of my life experience and healing that never make it on to this board. I do therefore struggle with the idea that people here would have a better sense of whether I can work safely in my current job, which carries high levels of risk, or whether I should continue in my training as a therapist than my family and friends who know me fully, or than the tutors, clinical director, therapist and clinical supervisor who see me day by day on this journey. I take my professional responsibilities seriously, I actively work on my health and well being, I work on my personal development and understanding how my experiences impact on me and, yes, potentially on the work I do. I'm closely supervised in practice and use this supervision openly and honestly.

While not everyone has PTSD, everyone does have their own "stuff" which is capable of being triggered at any time, that has the potential to impact on the therapeutic relationship and which can significantly impact their clients. That isn't the sole preserve of people with known prior mental health concerns and is why training and supervision are so key to good therapy for the duration of ones career, not just at the outset.

I honesty feel for people who have had god awful, dangerous experiences of therapy, some of the stuff I read here and elsewhere gives such cause for concern. Good, ethical practice is a basic right for anyone entering therapy and isn't, I believe, impossible for someone with prior issues of their own to provide.
 
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Ugh. Not in disagreement exactly... but gut clenching. Do no harm... do no harm.... do no harm is our mantra and I am a base care worker not a professional. Can I, looking in the mirror... do no harm? Not so sure.
 
@Suzetig I 100% second this and couldn't agree more. People use this forum for support with struggles and often will not post when their day was uneventful or they are healing and coping well. Many people will just stop posting during this time. We are each others support through the hard times many of us have in common and just as therapist should not give advise because they know only what we report we absolutely shouldnt. We don't even know each other face to face and I would think our Ts have a much better picture of us as people than the forum members. I'll just say a struggle a lot off and on but most people around consider me successful and high functioning. They don't eBen know I have emotional issues but yet I choose to work them out in therapy and here.
 
Can I, looking in the mirror... do no harm? Not so sure.
I know this is the standard my colleagues hold themselves to, I also know that they each have had times when they couldn't honestly answer that they are sure they've done no harm. We work with vulnerable people, with varying needs and challenges and at times, PTSD or not, we get it wrong. I know I can look at times in my current role when I would have done things differently given my time again, I also know my colleagues have similar experiences, no more and no less than I do.

I don't think professionals do set out to purposely harm, I think instead they get complacent, or think they can "save" a client, or neglect to care for themselves and end up out of their depth. I think there's different potential for those diagnosed with PTSD to get caught out but it can happen to anyone, at any time working with a vulnerable client group.
 
I disagree with "very strict supervision of psychology students" as stated by @Ed Norton. If this were hard and fast, there wouldn't be so many ill equipped psychologists out there who don't know what they're doing!

My narcissistic mother went into psychology.... I rest my case.
 
I disagree with "very strict supervision of psychology students" as stated by @Ed Norton

I can shed some light in this. A graduate mft student needs 3000 hours of supervision before getting a license. 300 can be counted by doing personal therapy to work out personal issues. supervision continues once a week until a therapist has passed a rigorous licensing exam. At this point supervision is called consultation and occurs with other licensed professionals on an as needed basis but is encouraged. Many therapist's use personal therapy both for their own issues, possible transference issues, and consultation as the therapist is another professional in the field.
 
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I have it on very good authority that some people with PTSD can go on to become excellent therapists while others struggle with it. What is the risk to others? I don't know for sure, but personally don't want to risk it.

I don't think I could handle it quite frankly, I have grown tired of talking about and hearing about trauma, anxiety, and depression etc. I guess you could say that I have grown weary of it and want to focus on happier, more positive things.

I am glad tho', that this thread is continuing to be discussed. Perhaps it will raise everyone's awareness, lead to truth, and hopefully some healing.
 
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I'd just like to add to @falling_wave's post - not every training program is good. Not every supervisor is good. But in the US, a combination of knowing where someone trained and did their clinical hours, and even under whom, will tell you a great deal about their qualifications. And what is very, very awful is that we have an incredibly broad range of service providers working inside a broad range of institutions. I have my choice of about 5 hospitals, if I were to need to go inpatient. And three of them I would avoid, for various reasons.

It is the people who have no choices in their health care in this country, either from lack of insurance or being in remote areas - they are most likely to encounter sub-standard mental health care.

Medicine is a business here, and the patient is the consumer. I think it's a very different dynamic from living somewhere with socialized health care. I cannot imagine what that would be like.

But I was with a family member after they had a full psychotic break and were emergency admit and inpatient at a large hospital in a huge city, and the hospital was considered bottom-of-the-barrel. His treatment in the ER was atrocious. But his treatment on the ward was outstanding. That psych department happened to be affiliated with a high level degree program, and it served as a teaching ward. Probably the best care my brother ever got, after about 15 years of badly managed mental illness.

/end tangent.
 
CRAZY!

So I became friends with another forum member who also wishes to become a therapist. Said member has not only PTSD but quite a few other mental health diagnosis'. Said member has read this thread and is unaffected by anything discussed here, won't consider any of the issues brought up, told me that they still plan on becoming a therapist.

Said member walked all over my boundaries and put me in a VERY bad place. I have blocked this person so that they cannot contact me ever again. I'm a bit disgusted that this person is so incredibly blind to the fact that he's hurt me by walking all over my boundaries.....and still thinks its a good idea to continue on the path toward becoming a therapist without any consideration regarding "is this truly a good idea?" Its blindness, a very selfish blindness in that this person wants what they want and doesn't even think for a second that he could damage other people.

And maybe I sound a bit judgmental, but I think its incredibly irresponsible to go gangbusters into becoming a therapist when there are so many personal issues that pretty much prevent this person from achieving the stability needed to be a good therapist. (borderline, DID....amongst others)
 
If this were true, Marsha Linehan should not have studied psychology, achieved degrees, and written the entire DBT modality.

I think she may be an exceptional case,
she's an exceptional person, but far from an exceptional case.

Bessel van der Kolk, states openly that he chose to work for the VA, because he got free psychotherapy as part of the deal. There is also Anita Sawyer who spent five years in psychiatric hospitals during her late teens and early twenties.
 
I can resonate with a line from the original post about being a 'wounded healer'. I feel that way about myself. I am pursuing my Massage license AGAIN, after trying for twenty years. The first two times I attempted the schooling it became just too much for me and my PTSD. SO now at my age I am trying again and I almost done!

I am astonished that I have gotten this far. It has a lot to do with finding the right people who can work with my unique challenges.
And that has a lot to do with the director of my program and her teachers.

SO, I say go for it.

Never give up and always go towards your heart and your life will follow.
 
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