Do I Dare Hope To Ever Get "better" Enough To Lead A Happy, Joyful Life?

[Inspired 2 B Free]

Hashi, I like what you said about "My aim is healing rather than management of the condition". You said this much better than I did, although it is what I meant, too.

My healing has come as a result of intense talk therapy which led to considerable emotional work. It is wonderful to hear of your progress and thank you for the reminder that one treatment option doesn't fit all.

I never knew "before" either. My abuse began very early on and I became adept at dissociating, but also had extreme outbursts. As a child, my PTSD symptoms were excused as me being a 'spoiled brat'.

 

[Tinyflame]

Yes, like Hashi said, for me healing is discovery, more than recovery. Peace means a lot to me, in terms of healing. Of course, much I don't accomplish perhaps in terms of self-acceptance or what have you, but I can recognize what is true to me.There's been lots of pain, but they say equally that determines the parameters or extent of joy, it's a bit of a requirement.

 

[lrs]

I've been where you are at. My answer to your question, "do I dare hope", is:
YUP.

I know what it is like to feel all hope is lost. I had PTSD, perhaps most of all my life, due to an abusive father. I was not formally diagnosed with PTSD until the late 1990's, but I had symptoms of PTSD as far back as I can remember.

In 2002, while in a drug rehab, I was told I could not take another hit in this life, I would kill myself. Psychiatric testing indicated I was in pretty bad shape.

In spite of the best treatment then available, I was going downhill fast. Then, in 2004, I did something unique, unrelated to any type of therapy. After 3 months, the nightmares, flashbacks, and schizoaffective consciousness had dissipated. When I realized what had occurred, I felt as though I made a significant discovery. I still believe this.

Because what I did was unconventional, I collected my thoughts for several months, then wrote a story about what happened. It is titled, "I Believe PTSD is Curable". It is on this forum, I think it would be an easy search.

PTSD is bad, about as bad as it gets. I sometimes think having it is about as traumatic on your life as whatever caused it in the first place. The hopelessness was one of the worst things to deal with. When the world's best are telling you there's no hope, that is a low point in despair.

My point in telling you this, is that there is always hope.