Do Normal Kids Molest Their Dolls?

[Utiwe]

I wrecked a cousin's life-size doll by ripping her a bit, and giving her a hole so I could molest her. It was like my coolest achievement around age six. We went beyond I'll show you if you show me and doctor. We were using fingers and this all seemed really natural to me. And how we'd play with dolls...give them holes so we could molest them too. Seem normal? Or too abnormal (somewhere are 5-8 yrs btw)? Or anyone else experience play like that?

I'm not sure about related memories. I suspect involvement with my mom (and her whole family of pervs...one died in jail). I felt ashamed of this later on. More stuff but the is good enough for today....thanks for reading, considering

 

[Egu]

give them holes so we could molest them too.

I would have to ask how a 5-8 year old would even have a concept of this. Where would they have learned it/seen it in order to imitate it?

 

[Utiwe]

That's what I don't know, but I knew what I was doing. I got some friends involved but I was the leader, showing them how we do this. Lots of shame years later, but then yes, wondering where that even came from.

 

[Utiwe]

(I've had nightmares of being molested by a parent but I don't know that any of it connects)

 

[Huve]

Any siblings that you can speak to?

 

[Vejamu]

Hard to say. I knew how sex worked around 1st grade and over the next few years barbie and ken certainly had their share of encounters (and I was not the only one among my friends like this). So, maybe.

On the other hand I also did some strange things that freaked out other kids like try to get my friend to pretend we were being held hostage and molested. I don't know where that came from. I was always just weird, I guess. I don't believe that I was ever sexually abused that early. There's a possibility of a few later incidents, but I really don't believe anything happened before I was 9 or 10.

 

[Suziraz]

We were using fingers and this all seemed really natural to me. And how we'd play with dolls...give them holes so we could molest them too. Seem normal?

I would not call this normal. Kids of 6-8 shouldn't even know to use fingers "there"
Im sorry you feel shame later on, but there must have been a reason why you knew that stuff
((hugs)) as Im sure you may have a lot of stuff you need to work through. I hope you can talk to a T about this to make sense of it all.

 

[Ogo]

Nope. Not normal early childhood behavior. Even in kids who've seen sex IRL they tend to make their dolls bounce on top of each other like they've seen adults do.

 

[Utiwe]

I have talked to my T....told her about the dolls and how we played. And the nightmare. But nothing else has really shown up in my mind. Just disjointed snippets of feelings.

But also, when I was assaulted, the guy used his fingers and I totally shutdown...blackout drunk actually. I don't know what happened afterwards, but his fingers inside me tossed me over the edge. I swallowed a whole bottle of painkillers within a week. It was horrid, but felt more like attached to earlier horrid and I just had to kill myself...it was too much...

 

[Utiwe]

How do you retrieve these memories? In a nightmare, my mom was cold and molesting me...zero care, like punishing me. I saw a guy through a doorway killing himself with a knife by taking out his own guts. It was so powerful. I wanted to be him. Obviously lots of potential sympbolism...I don't attach too much meaning. I don't know why a neglectful, physically abusive mom would want to take it that far....or maybe make me feel as bad as she felt....that was not beyond her.

I'm straight but replay lezbiain consensual scenes....,,,like trying to have a happy ending......and then in real sex, with men I just freeze up

 

[Utiwe]

Utiwe is "Chava' the snail, btw.

 

[Pevi]

Hi Utiwe,
Very sorry to hear that. Not sure if I can be of any help...I do think such behaviour is indicative of "sexualised behaviour" which goes beyond what would typically happen for that age. Though the thing is such behaviour in children does not necessarily mean they were sexually abused though...could be genuinely innocent through children being inadvertently exposed to pornography, or lack of boundary setting by parents etc.

This is something I've had to think about myself...I do recall at a young age (probably 7 or 8) where my brother and I were playing a game, which consisted of (apologies, I'm sorry this is really graphic) him making me "kiss" his penis. I look at this behaviour now, and seriously question its "normalcy." I was never abused sexually, but still somewhat at a loss as to where in the world I got that idea from...certainly not from exposure to anything inappropriate (my parents were such prudes my own mother was too embarrassed to discuss periods with my sister and myself).

Also on a similar note - I had the weirdest dream a couple of months ago...which was sexually violent, and involved something trying to break into my childhood home, essentially to rape me. I hardly ever have dreams, but when I do, they do tend to be about people attacking me and there's usually a sexual element involved.

Also of concern, is the fact that (apologies, totally embarrassing) - I wet the bed well into my teens...and it literally only stopped when I left home.

There's quite a lot of info out there on "sexualised behaviour" and children, and red flags etc.

Not sure if any of the above helped any, but if it's any consolation, you're not on your own on this.
take care