Do you speak with a loud voice?

[NewBeginnings]

New thought -as with most things, communicating loudly or softly is probably mostly attributable to our upbringings (especially the early years).

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I just had a thought and it is a guess mostly, yet I know that I just recently found my own voice and it is speaking up for me in ways that never occurred before in my entire life.

communicating loudly or softly is probably mostly attributable to our upbringings (especially the early years).

I think that this is the reason I have always had a loud voice. The desire to be listened to and heard among other things as well.

 

[Deleted member 8714]

If you train a horse with shouts it will not obey your whispers.

Love that quote @Rain.

 

[Ronin]

If I speak at all, I'm super quiet.

Unless defending someone. Then it depends on the kind of anger I'm running on, and how pissed off, or not, I am / how badly minding showing it.

 

[Deleted member 8714]

My husband has never noticed anything loud about my voice.

Now my therapist has a quieter voice so maybe I sound loud to her?

 

[Deleted member 12723]

My husband has never noticed anything loud about my voice.

The only people who had a problem with the volume of my voice were family members who were embarrassed by me talking too loud for them. I think it is their codependent issues and it says more about them than me. They were the only ones who brought it up. Maybe others are embarrassed too, but it is out of my control so I just accept this about me nowadays.

I am glad you like the quote.

 

[Neverthesame]

If I don't know you:
Barely audible, short to the point sentences spoken quickly. Which I usually have to repeat several times.
*Interestingly, I learned this also applies to completely deaf people who read lips. Apparently a somewhat faded Yorkshire accent mumbled, is as hard to read as it is to hear. Who knew?
Guess I'm forcing equality on them ablest types. If the deaf can't hear me, no one will. Mwa, ha ha!*

If I do know you:
The same as above just more words, people just learn to understand me... or get better at pretending to, either way. It's fine with me.

If I don't like you:
Silence, or barked single word commands. Very audible, though I usually still have to repeat myself. Some people are just stubborn.
Anger management has done wonders for keeping me able to get things done this way with people. Without escalating it into a shouting match. Kinda hard to explain, but I guess it would called a form of assertiveness.
I don't get in trouble for doing this either, so vast improvement from how these interactions used to go.

Edit: Removed (hopefully) all the empty space at the bottom of the post. Don't know how that got there.

 

[Deleted member 42957]

I too speak very quietly and fast. I think I'm so embarrassed to speak I get it out quick so it's over. I was brought up with 'children should be seen and not heard' and wasn't allowed to speak unless I was asked to do so.

 

[Deleted member 8714]

I've been at a grocery store or warehouse type store and had people turn their heads when I speak. I wonder if I sound like I speaking through a loud speaker? The look they give me is like that. Who's making the announcement over there?

 

[Mach123]

Yes this is very embarrassing for me. : (. I specially hate when I leave a conversation and then I think back and wonder was a shouting at them? My wife is always shushing me and It used to hurt my feelings but now I'm glad because it helps me control it.

 

[Deleted member 8714]

Well, I found out in my first therapy appointment what the loud voice is about. T said it's a defensive mechanism to keep people away. Makes complete sense to me. The louder I am, the more people back away from me. Also T said that people will be less likely to approach you to talk, friendship, etc. if you're voice is loud.

 

[The Albatross]

Extremely rare that I am loud. My family all used to scream... I used to whisper or talk low. Still do. The more upset I am the more they would have to lean in to try to hear me, if they cared to. A trick I use on most all irrationally loud and out of control people. The louder they are the lower/quieter I am... then I let em have it with a leveler which usually leaves em either bug eyed or speechless but makes em think long enough to quit and they don't think I'm rude.