Poll Do Your Family and Friends Support You?

[Deleted member 12723]

I get some support from my husband. I have a sponser who does'nt understand it but she does'nt judge me. She is very accepting of me and what I need to do to take care of myself. I pretty much support myself. I have this forum now. It has made a profound difference in my life. ''

I've gotten lots of help and support and really good information. Great topic.

 

[lisamarie]

My family isn't the most supportive (except my dad) but most of my friends are pretty awesome. A couple of them have clearly gotten sick of my constant crap (LOL) but most have handled it really well. I'm pretty lucky.

 

[NIKI]

I get zero support from parents, brother or sister. Nothing. In fact, they do not want me to talk to them about it. My sister said she did not want to infect her family with me. Her exact words.

My brother has his own life. He did tell me that he also has PTSD but he never calls to talk and NEVER visits.

My parents are in complete denial. They told my husband to not let me come around their house and start trouble. Which I had no intention of going to their house ever. So I am victimized twice. Once going through it, living it. Then calling them out on it. They don't want to hear anything. They will NOT own up to it. So, I just have to go on without validation.

My son does not really know what happened to me as a child. He doesn't really know that I need support for it. I don't want to tell him about it. I don't want to damage him.

My husband tries to help. He is the only support I have in real life.

This forum has been a Godsend and I am saving money to donate. I will donate $20 dollars today but I want to donate much more.

I am proud of myself right now because I wrote this post out with only a couple of tears where before I would have had a total breakdown. I also had a panic attack today and I refused to be pulled completely into it. I am learning to support myself.

 

[Invisible-Guy]

I've notice that my family (at least most of them) try to wrap their mind around what's happened, but they don't really understand it. I think it's one of those things you have to go through to understand the true nature of this beast. I has changed the dynamic of all relationships and I have behaved in ways that have alienated myself from most of the family. I understand, and I don't blame them. Sometimes I really don't like myself.

 

[Invisible-Guy]

Even though I worked for 26 years, put myself through college, and even own a decent home, I feel that my family has labeled me as a deadbeat because I have not been able to work for over 4 years.

 

[Invisible-Guy]

I found out recently that my family thought it was all just "hormones". All that time I was struggling and going through hell, they thought I was "just hormonal".:unsure:

Hi Philippa, I've had a lot of similar feelings at times. Your experiences are unique to you and other people just can't seem to understand what made you break. I get a lot of the "turn the page" talk or comparisons of how grandpa walk barefoot in the snow to go to school. The thing is, physical trauma had never set me back, but the mind and been a whole new struggle. If you tell someone you have cancer, they have empathy, if you tell them you're depressed, they usually minimize it or make comparisons.

 

[Philippa]

Thanks Invisible-Guy.

I get from my brother, or have gotten in the past, told that he knows so many women who've been raped, and they're "over it". so why can't I be?

I said to him that they may think they are over it, but then again,they may also just be taking drugs (like him) to escape it, and haven't actually dealt with all the underlying stuff.) Just being around them is risking opening myself to even more ignorant comments that carry the underlying message that I am somehow defective or not this or that enough, or that I should be more like my brothers or my cousin...and then they have the nerve to turn around and tell me that they "Love me unconditionally". I doubt they even know what that means.

 

[Invisible-Guy]

My family is fragmented into small segments all over the place. Pros and Cons of autonomy. Easier to hide from when needed :)

 

[HeatherNM]

I receive amazing support from my partner and my best friend. My stepmom really tries to understand but when we have the hard discussions, I worry that the memories I share from my childhood make her feel scared and inadequate. My dad doesn't understand why my wounds have not healed, I believe he views me as weak...that I should be able to more effectively compartmentalize. My mom is in her own deep pain, so I don't typically share my panic, depression, and anxiety with her.

 

[Tanishq]

I have only one family member to count on. I don't want to reveal much personal info here. But yes, she is very honest family member of mine and does her best she can. Relieves me, makes me feel loved as a family member and makes me feel counted so much.

Edit: I am on the way to meet other family members,too who were meant to be.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

things have improved for me. I have been having emdr sessions and my family has been very supportive. They see the real good it is accomplishing. My life is getting better as a result of all of this. I am very happy to tell this story. It makes me feel very loved.

 

[Invisible-Guy]

I don't think my family can wrap their mind around a normal human range of emotion (including depression) and PTSD compaired to a debilitating clinical level of depression. I guess that's a good thing in a way though, I wouldn't wish this on anybody I love. They do try though to understand though.