Does Correcting Your Grammar Cause You Stress When Using This Forum?

[Ambience]

I would not come here if there were fewer regulations on spelling/grammar/punctuation. (I find plenty of irritating errors as it is!) These rules make it possible for me to read and understand what others are trying to say. If you write poorly paragraphed, difficult-to-decipher messages, people cannot communicate with you.

In fact, these regulations are in place partly to facilitate precisely that kind of communication--short paragraphs are encouraged, for example, because we all get overwhelmed and disoriented so easily. Most of us, if we can't understand a message, will skip right past it. The rules are no different than you would find in any other area of public communication. Yes, it sometimes mean breaking habits (even I can get used to 'i' instead of 'I' sometimes), but it's worth it for us to be heard by one another.

Thankyou. It's really hard to break a habit your in. I agree I do skip stuff also when it's not paragraphed in a short way. I can see the point in correct grammar, it's just it seemed abit overboard that's all. Glad that it's working for you. .....I get so frustrated that I keep writing i. It is so engrained in me to write that....very frustrating! Thanks for sharing, it's appreciated :)

 

[Ambience]

If you use Mozilla Firefox it will have a spell checker--or at least it does for me.

I'm on guest so I need administrator access to put a spell check on this computer. On my pc it's okay, but on my boyfriends not. I guess I could ask him to install it, but he doesn't like having anything additional on his pc.

Argh..., If you could see how many times I write i in one sentence, you would know how bad this feels, especially when you're trying to get out something that is close to your heart.

 

[catjudo]

Are you sure these things work for the majority, have you ever had a poll on this matter?

I do agree to abide by the rules, but i still am wondering why this forum has rules that are far stricter than other forums- i.e like it's run by english teachers, rather than moderators who have experienced trauma themselves.

If you had spent some time reading the forum or even doing a basic search you would have found the answer to your questions. I would suggest you starting by watching this video. [DLMURL]http://www.ptsdforum.org/threads/13907-Why-Grammar-Punctuation-Spelling-And-Title-Rules-Exist-Video?p=144584&highlight=grammar+rules#post144584[/DLMURL]

And for the record, all of the moderators are either PTSD sufferers or carers. The majority of us have, in fact, experienced trauma.

The reason being , i was held hostage in relation to my abortion, and i was made to do something I didn't want to do. Here I am being made to write I instead of i. Can you see the trigger?

Actually, I don't quite see the trigger. However, this forum is not about helping people AVOID triggers but rather providing some degree of exposure therapy in addition to the valuable information and support that can be found here.

I also didn't like it when I joined the forum being monitored before I could become a trusted member. It gave me a sense of distrust about the forum, in the moderators. You want the moderators to be your friends, people who will look after you, not people who are checking up on you to see if you write anything wrong.

The moderators are helping to look after the members here. That is exactly the reason for new members initially have restricted access. It is not to monitor your writing skills, it is to ensure that you are a PTSD sufferer or carer, rather than a spammer or someone here to prey upon people who have already experienced trauma and victimization.

 

[Ambience]

Oh yes that reminds me- my first view of the forum- Am i a predetor? Lovely ...no i'm a human being. I felt that very threatening. I already feel bad enough aborting my unborn child, let alone being moderated incase i'm going to prey on the community. I'm sorry but isn't that the exception to the rule. Aren't most people decent? Also wouldn't someone who was preying on someone be undetactable I imagine, abiding by the rules.

Just a thought, how do you catch a predetor? Interesting that this forum makes judgement on which human being is viable for this forum and who is not. That did freak me out abit. I don't think breeding fear in people is good.

Yes we all know there are bad people out there, half the people here have experienced them. Why should the trauma sufferer even for a few moments be made to feel like a potential perpertrator. I think that spammers are quite obvious, communities are very good at avoiding being sucked into things and they look out for one another. This is my experience on other forums. As i am a member, i'm not feeling very looked after, or do you pick and choose who you look after. That's the way it seems on here. That's all i'm say.

First lets judge you, then if you pass our tests we will accept you into our elite tribe. I know this mentality because my boyfriend has it, he has a very regimented forum, very army style. Maybe because my dad was in the army and said he wanted to kill me with a shotgun and ship me to a desert island i rebel against authority.

I think most people in life experience trauma in one way or another, I appreciate the moderators have too, it's not about that, it's about the regime here. It seems to strict. Just off in my view. Just my oppinion again. I'm only venting all this in this thread. I perfectly respect how sensitive this forum is in nature.

Maybe I should have kept it in. I don't know how to deal with the anger , the stress of ptsd when you are triggered, then something seemingly trivial overwhelms you and you start getting stressed out at everyone around you.

 

[Nicolette]

To cut a long story short - if you dont like the rules you are welcome to leave. You are most welcome to stay however if you are here for the right reasons.

As for the other crap; I've had to abort a child too so get off your soap box thinking you need special treatment. I could tell you a story or two of my trauma but at the end of the day we are here to try & help heal the trauma and have a better quality of life - not to compare who suffered more.

You are really starting to cheese me off with this as it is boardering on argumentative.

And if you are saying this is starting to stress you and you are taking it out on others it is time to walk away from the forum, take a break for the day, and come back when you are in a better frame of mind.

 

[Ambience]

It's something that has traumatized me. I don't think it's crap. I am in a bad frame of mind actually, but I was just challenging the status quo regarding the capitalization. I don't see how it's that fundementally detrimental to the quality of what is being written.

My boyfriend says he likes you, says if you aren't upseting someone then your not living. That was with regards to my reaction to you saying that my abortion is ..."other crap". It was very significant to me, more significant than any other trauma i've endured, and i have endured alot. Some people react differently to different things I guess. I wouldn't belittle the experience for yourself or myself.

I don't want to argue, so i'll leave it at that and continue to post on the forum in an amicable way. Apologise if I have given anyone any particular perception of me that is not in my true nature. I believe all beings are of pure love including myself, even though, yes I do have a very argumentative side :)

Thankyou for debating this topic with me. I think you have cleared everything up.

 

[Nicolette]

Clarification: "other crap" meaning using your trauma as an argument for not following the rules.

My point - I have suffered that same particular trauma but I can still manage to follow the grammatical rules which you are complaining about. Having an abortion has nothing to do with the unwillingness to capitalize the word "I".

 

[Ambience]

Apologises if I've entwined my abortion into this grammatical debate. That wasn't really intended. I don't know if anyone has got anything of value out of this. If not , then that's fine. I just wanted to know it was okay to have a voice here. I needed to know what people thought to the grammar, if it was stressful to adapt to the forums requirements. Totally unrelated to my abortion. I've just gone on abit of a tangent.

 

[anthony]

I have removed the poll from this thread, as you do not get to run polls on forum rules and policies. The rules are very clear and they exist for very good reasons. You can question about rules, but you do not have the right to challenge them and create such a fuss over it. As stated... your choices are simple. You either comply to this forums rules or you use another forum that doesn't have as strict a rules. Simple, easy, choice is an individual one.

The rules of this forum do not bend to any member, you either conform or you don't. End of discussion.

There is. It's called your trauma diary. Last I knew, you were allowed to write however the heck you want in it...someone please correct me if I'm wrong on that.

No, the diaries have never been a "do as you please" area. The blogs are your personal space with very little rules. The diaries give you a lot more freedom to express yourself, but you must still comply with the rules within them. The FAQ rules outline the differences clearly, forum vs. blog rules.

 

[Jestadud]

As Ambience has been good enough to put her age and where about in the world she's from I'd like to offer something in the way of possible background to this problem. My kid's are 21 and 24, over here in the UK the mobile phone is like the new god and there is a new language that goes with it "text slang" this also carries over to emails. Many times me or my wife have received messages that we can't decipher between us and have to phone to ask what the message is about.
Text's are cheaper than calls plus they usually have so many free text each month to use up. Most of the young can write then send text messages just using their thumb and they don't use capitals. So I can understand the frustration when someone used to this form of expression bangs out a post then realises they have to go back through it capitalizing all the i's.

I must admit that this would be such a minor irritation that I could easily put up with, as I could still understand what was being said. But generally I like the fact that this forum is strict about the rule's and I particularly like the fact that all new members have to go through a period of moderation before being let loose all over the place.

Oh and Ambience I won't go on about how late at night you were on here, but had to chuckle at " After a few more Vodkas, I feel composed. "
Yep, up late had a drink the perfect time for rational discussion and not upsetting anybody! :doh:

Take it easy.
Jesta

 

[anni]

I just came across this thread, and am certainly not entering into any conflict nor wish to. I do have to say that I just find free-form writing to be terribly confusing to follow and for some reason ( I have no idea on the planet why-it's not a judgement ) somewhat upsetting.

The only way I can deal with this stupid PTSD is an exhausting containment of symptoms. Order is tantamount in this mode of picking my way through life, and BOY, anything confusing, inprecise or dimly understood quite simply either shuts down the system or causes panic. It's quite frankly just the way it is, and the various rules of 'containment' one can rely on here make it no small part of it's comforting aspect for a PTSD 'sufferer'.

Everyone is different with this thing; this is just my take.

 

[emmat]

The whole grammar, punctuation and capitalisation thing stresses me out, mainly though because I'm dyslexic. Anything that tells me off for making those mistakes when I've tried to avoid them stresses me out. I often look at my writing, check it, spell check it but still mistakes easily slip through. It sucks when you've tried but you still end up with a warning. I understand ease of communication is important, but it's hard when you've got a learning disability and you aren't being purposefully lazy. It's the pervasive and pernicious idea that seems to take over on various Internet forums where people believe that 'all Spelling, Punctuation & Grammar issues are just due to laziness on the behalf of the writer' I don't like.

Luckily for me this forum has been pretty friendly to my dyslexia. So far the only things I've been picked up on by mods are areas when I've missed capitalisation in titles. I'd naturally be a lot less happy if I was getting emails with every little mistake pointed out - of which I'm sure there are plenty ;-)