Does Ptsd Ever Go Away? Do Triggers Ever Stop? I Want To See My Family

[Ecole]

My parents are immigrants and most of our family lives outside of Canada, so I've spent a lot of my childhood visiting them. Visiting them has become a major trigger ever since one of our in-laws assaulted me and going back to my parents' home country is like one giant episode the entirety of the trip. I've had PTSD for 9 years now and my symptoms have become for the most part mild, but when I'm back there it's like my PTSD takes the wheel and shifts into maximum overdrive.

I don't know if I'm only just starting to grieve, but I miss my cousins. I miss relaxing on the beaches and playing in the water, our food, the cultural quirks, and being surrounded by family. I can't even speak the language anymore. I spent the last 9 years dreading every time I had to go back but now that my mother has finally stopped forcing me to go, I've started to miss it.

Visiting my cousins in a third location doesn't work either, as my family themselves are a trigger.

Do triggers ever go away, or at least lessen in severity?

It's causing me so much grief not knowing if there'll ever be a chance of me seeing them again.

 

[Ava]

I hear what u are saying, same thing exactly for me, I love my family, and I have done everything in my power to heal for many years, I have been successful in creating a pretty decent life when I am not around them, but I get pretty triggered when around them then end up spending a lot of time on regulating that it is frustrating, I am going through it now. I know exactly what u are saying about feeling homesick, for me it comes to putting up with being uncomfortable to be around them. Sometimes it is worth it sometimes not. Wishing u the best!

 

[Izus]

I really don't know. Family as a whole is very important - especially to my parents (we're 8 not counting all the in-laws). They don't even know that they have been triggers. I've never had the courage to tell them.

Others I try to avoid. I'm not in your shoes, so I can't relate to a lot of what you're saying except that for me, it really depends on whether my threshold is higher or lower at the time I visit. If my threshold or tolerance is higher, than my coping skills come into play. Other times I feel myself going into auto mode. - when that happens, it seems as though all I've learned goes out the window.

it's a hard balance to try and find. Which is the lesser of two evils? Perhaps you need to spend time on learning some more intense grounding and coping techniques to be able to use when visiting. Might be worth a short trip to find out. Can you plan a trip that only puts you in contact with a couple of people instead of a crowd?