Embarrassing Reaction To Feeling Exposed In Therapy

[Hunos]

I want to see how common this reaction is and how some of you have dealt with it if you have experienced it. Sometimes I say emotional things that I am afraid to say in therapy or make me feel really embarrassed or like she can all of the sudden look through me. I want to say what I sat and it ultimately makes me feel more understood and progresses therapy. The thing is I have this super embarrassing problem. I think I pee a little by mistake or something every time I have that scared vulnerable feeling. Only I know it's happening but it makes me withdraw a bit from being that open because I am trying to hide my disgust with myself. I thought about telling my doctor but I don't want to bring up any more mental health stuff that I am trying to make physical. I know it needs to be dealt with through the mental health perspective. Do you know if this will get better over time or how to fix it?

 

[Neseb]

It's a very mammal-thing to do!

There are 2 versions: Submissive urination (a few drops to show submissiveness to the creature in front of you, don't eat me/you're boss!) & piss-scared (adrenaline dump shuts off digestion & evacuates the products therein. Generally in the following order: urine, vomit, excrement. It's why even if you remain in control, people pee more often when nervous. From job interviews to playing Hide'n'go'seek.) It can really be in almost any order, though. Round here you'll see a lot of people talking about anxiety levels being so high they're puking all the time, or have the shits. Incontinence of various forms gets less press, but I suspect it's just as common as the other 2.

This sounds like submissive urination, since it's just a little...Drives a lot of dog owners absolutely insane, that's where you'll find most of the literature pointed at if you google it... but all/most mammals do it. It's linked to lower levels of anxiety / wanting to be accepted rather than straight up terror. (More "you're boss" Less "don't eat me"). Baby mammals do it to/for nearly all authority figures. Adults it's less common. Per se. A lot of adults get a little turned on in front of people they seriously respect/want to like them. In certain bio psych circles this is explained away as actually a few drops of urine trying to escape, and the sphincter tightening to control it. Creating a little bit of chub, or a prolonged keigle hold. Shrug. Who knows? Maybe power is sexy, maybe we've all just got to pee.

Yes. It goes away, whether it's piss scared or submissive behavior. For the same reason; 'familiarity breeds contempt'. You become less afraid or more sure of yourself. In the meantime I suggest a pad. If you're male, a discreet one are "nursing pads". Which are slightly concave round pads filled with dry gel meant to slip into the bra of a nursing mother. Slips inside a boxer brief or tighty-whitey just fine.

 

[Hunos]

I think does make sense. Gee I feel a bit abnormal trying to look for info and finding all the literature on dogs. As I was thinking about the submissive nature of it I think that this is due in part to a difficulty with trust. I think I get a sudden fear that I shouldn't have trusted and then it happens. Although, I don't have this same reaction in relationships I find the only way I can get turned on is when I feel I don't have any control. If I do anything vulnerable it gives me a fear reaction so it's easier to be controlled.

 

[Erusi]

Stress induced leakage is pretty common among women. Try Kegel exercises. That helped me. Also, taking a slow deep breath can help too. A urologist told me to try both of them. If it persists and keeps bothering you, see a urologist. Mine didn't even have to check anything out down there (thank goodness). I was just able to explain the problem and they helped me figure out options.