Exposure Therapy

[cmd]

I've run the gamut of medications and CBT and DBT and none of it has been much good. In the fall, I went to see yet another psychiatrist, hoping that maybe I could get an antidepressant or antianxiety because I have been a mess. (Domestic abuse survivor + queer also makes therapy hard.) The psychiatrist told me I'm not a candidate for any kind of medication but that I should try exposure therapy and gave me a full referral.

Is it normal for exposure therapy to make everything worse?

I was coping before. Not super well, but coping. It's been about 5 years since I got out, so I've developed coping mechanisms. And now it's like someone pulled the rug out from under me. I'm vulnerable and exposed and everything has me jumping, I can't sleep, I can't eat, I'm seeking out self destructive behaviors (I know exactly how to find people who will treat me like my ex and this is pretty much the worst thing I could be doing to myself). I talked to the therapist and we've reduced my sessions from once a week to twice a month but I feel like I'm being run ragged.

I also feel like I'm impossible to be around/a terrible friend and roommate. I can't focus and everything gets me upset and angry/scared. It's unbearable.

 

[Changing4Best]

I've been told my a therapist I had a few years back that it would get worse before it got better. I think it did get worse for awhile, but it got better after that and I was able to leave my abuser and start a new life. My T now is using several different techniques on me (her words) and I am down to seeing her once a month. I am doing pretty well, though I do have dips once in awhile. I had one the last few days, but I am still encouraged enough to say that it has all been for the best.

I'd suggest that you do mention that things have gotten worse, maybe even ask your T if that is to be expected (if you have not asked already). There is always the option of finding another therapist, if all else fails. I'd suggest you give it some time before you choose that road, however.

I wish you the best and I am sorry to hear that it has gotten worse for this time being.

 

[Biz]

Wow. I totally identify with your post. I'm a queer + domestic abuse survivor too. It was 5 years in January. I did exposure therapy with my previous therapist, for two sessions, I quit soon after. It got worse, like way way worse. Crying spells that wouldn't stop; I had a cast on my hand and tried to rip it off (which cracks me up to think about now) worse. I'm sorry you're having the worse part right now; I hope you are able to find a way to move through it with all the pieces to your life not too worse for wear.

Now I have a new therapist, she's great and supportive and she doesn't push me in the same way; I do EMDR now. I know I'm not the best at coping, I can, but other people do and they don't try as hard, and I've learned that a big part of my coping is holding on to the comfort/connection I feel in therapy and extending that through my week. It would be harder for me if I saw my therapist less often as things intensified. I don't want to throw a lot on my friends or my roommate. If it's the same for you, maybe you could ask for less sessions of exposure and schedule sessions to process with your therapist in between. I've found meditation classes help me too.

 

[ekane]

Get a new therapist. Try emdr. Get someone who has more skills, so if/when emdr needs to be modified or stopped, they can give you art therapy or group therapy etc etc. Make exposure therapy your last resort. Follow your gut.

 

[Ghostybear73]

It is normal for you to get worse before you get better with exposure therapy, your therapist should have told you that. You are being exposed to the worst and most traumatic times of your life. I agree with @Biz that maybe you should lessen the frequency of exposure therapy and add some processing sessions where you can talk about what is going on with you after exposure therapy and get some coping strategies under your belt.

I wish you the best.

 

[Justmehere]

Exposure therapy should make things worse while doing the exposure work - but not so much in between sessions. The therapist should be working to make sure you can contain the work to the sessions and leave in an ok state and not so symptomatic between sessions. If there is an increase in self destructive behaviors then the exposure work is likely going too fast. Not that it means there should be less sessions, but lighter exposure work and more time spend resourcing.

I get into self destructive aka trauma reenacting relationships too when my exposure therapy type of treatment is going too fast.

I would suggest getting a second opinion from another therapist and another doc. Maybe EMDR or somatic experiencing would be a better fit for the work of processing the trauma.

 

[Victory Is Mine]

I am so sorry to hear how miserable you are right now! :(

I am currently doing exposure therapy. It has made me kind of a jerk to the people around me during certain parts, and it sucks pretty hard sometimes... but my therapist worked extensively with me in the beginning to make sure that I was able to cope with the exposure part. We made absolutely sure beforehand that I was not in danger of self-destructive behavior, and I have a bunch of plans/skills written down that I can use if things get out of control. My therapist also thoroughly explained exactly what to expect, as far as worsening symptoms, etc. If your therapist did not do this for you before moving ahead, I personally would recommend a new one.

Maybe you are not in a good place to do exposure therapy right now? I agree with @Justmehere's advice about getting a second opinion, and maybe going slower. It's true that I feel exposed and like the rug has been pulled out from under me a lot, but I have been carefully preparing for this for months with my therapist and I trust her 100%. I am really benefiting from this treatment, so of course I think it can be really useful. However, I think it's super important to do it in a safe way.