Feeling Good About Taking Sick Leave Now

[externalsmile]

I've been off work sick the past week because of stress getting on top of me and being increasingly unable to cope with trivial matters. At first it was making me feel bad because I felt like it was me being weak and being a victim again and running away from problems.

After a good talk with both my counsellor and one of my managers I realise it is actually a positive thing. I'm letting myself have the time to build up my strength before the investigation finally starts.

I've been keeping myself really busy and doing my best to do things that I enjoy. By doing all this I am helping myself get back to my normal fighter self so I am as strong as I can be to deal with what is ahead.

Now.........if only my good old friend Sleep would come and visit! I miss him and would like him in bed with me tonight.

 

[Marley]

It's good to take a break from reality sometimes!

 

[externalsmile]

Well I wouldn't be calling it a break from reality! I'm taking time so I can see reality again! Time off work is giving me time to acknowledge what has happened to me and process it in a healthy way. It has been tough work and an emotional period so definitely not a break from reality.

 

[Marley]

A break from the work world, then. :)

 

[PNW_Trees]

I have been wondering about the same thing. I rarely take sick days, but I am taking one today. Last week (the last month really) was very stressful at work and I was having frequent anxiety attacks. I really couldn't take time off then, but my schedule was light today. On the one hand I really need a bit of time to rest and pull myself together so I can be effective at my work, on the other I feel guilty using sick time when I am not really physically ill.

 

[Jawn]

PNW_Trees,

Think of it as preventing yourself from getting sick. Afterall, you are taking time to unwind and leave some stress behind. If you don't do that you will eventually get sick at some point because your body will get run down. At least that is how I look at it.

Jawn

 

[externalsmile]

Exactly what Jawn said. If you keep going and going you will eventually hit a brick wall and it will be 10 times worse off. It will hit you harder and it will take alot longer and alot more work to recover from.

Think of it is a broken leg, you fall and it hurts like hell, you think it may be damaged but refuse to get it seen to and keep on doing as you normally do. You have a mountain climbing weekend coming up so you go on it with your damaged leg. The result is you mess up that leg so much that when you eventually get help it needs a major surgery and months of various treatments and time out. If you had gone to get it treated when the damage was first done a few weeks of a cast and rest you would have been stronger to cope with the mountain climb.

Same goes for your mind. You have the signals there is something wrong....frequent panic attacks. That is the signal you need to treat yourself. Be it a visit to the doctor, time off work and whatever else is recommended. If you keep on going as is and you do hit something big lifewise you will not be able to handle it aswell because you haven't given yourself the time to get strong again.


Now......ME TIME! lol!

Anyways, I got a call from my support manager at work. I don't know why but I just don't seem to be able to be honest and say......yeah I feel like crap, I'm not ready for work. I feel like I'm under pressure to go back. There is a huge staffing crisis and the hospital director wants to know when I am coming back. Since the phonecall I feel like crap. I feel like the everything is collapsing in on me.

The thought of going back to work next week to work on my own fills me with dread. It is horribly lonely. The week after that my colleague should be back from sick leave aswell and I wouldn't mind going back then. He is fantastic company and we have a great time working together. Lots of joking around and he looks out for me aswell. He knows about everything that is going on so there are no awkward questions when I have to go to meetings about the investigation. If there is crap going on that is too stressful for me to deal with he takes over. Rather when I was on my own I would have to deal with it on my own which would just increase my stress levels.

I made an appointment to see my doctor on Friday morning so hopefully he will agree that it is premature for me to go back to work yet.

 

[externalsmile]

I had my doctors appointment yesterday. He is very happy with continuing with signing my sick letters and feels it is benefiting me. He discussed signing me out until the investigation interviews start. I'm not exactly keen on that idea because Lord knows how long I would be off.

My collegue is due back to work on the 23rd and I am happy to go back then. Actually.....I'm excited about going back! Working with him is a fantastic experience. It is fun and enjoyable and exactly what I need. I've even started mentally plotting out the work plan for the first 2 weeks already. wooooohoooooo! Excitement!

 

[PainX2]

I've gone through bouts of feeling good about being off work and feelings of guilt. It's a strange process, especially when your work has been what defined you in the past. I've been placed off work since Jul 21 and currently I'm not scheduled to go back until the end of Sept. It's tough because sometimes the guilt gets the better of me and I feel like I should be back in my team. I've been denied Short Term disability (currently apppealing) which frankly has been freeing in a way. When I found out that I WASN'T being paid to be off work, I was strangely at peace with being off, less guilt. Thankfully I have an understanding spouse and a nest egg which allows us to afford this time for me. It will cut into savings, but for my health its necessary.

I wish you health and happiness with this time to heal externalsmile!