Feeling Like A Bad Person

[nomedic1]

I have been processing a large amount of my bad memories. Even though I am slowly making peace I can stop myself from feeling like I'm a bad person. Has anybody else experienced this or is my brain trying to tell me something.?

 

[ms spock]

The feeling like a bad person was with me all of the time. Now on somedays it is easing off.

You are terribly hard on yourself nomedic1 and I don't know what to suggest.

 

[nomedic1]

I seem to not be able to see the good in myself

 

[macca]

Even someone the world would agree was very, very bad, (i.e. Hitler), had a streak of good. He loved dogs. Obviously he was an evil person, but as evil as he was, there was that tiny bit of good. I'm pretty sure you are nowhere near him on the "bad" scale, and have a heck of a lot more good in you. Certainly a hell of a lot more than you can see right now. I struggle with this too, so it's easier said than done, but it helps me to try and get perspective like that.

 

[Everhopeful]

Is reflecting on oneself and one's life and wanting change and peace and love and forgiveness, not a sign of some good within yourself? A sociopath or narcissist gives not one iota of thought to these things. Those are the only two categories of humans, that probably have no real good in them, as they have no moral conscience, no empathy and no compassion.

You don't sound like either of the two, dear Nomedic1.

 

[nomedic1]

Thanks guys I would like to apologize for my negative outlook over the past couple of days. Need a good smack to the head

 

[Everhopeful]

No need for apologies or explanations, or much less, smacks to the head. :wacky:

 

[macca]

If none of us here ever expressed negative feelings, the forum would not exist! Instead of the smack to the head, read your posts imagining someone else wrote them - what would you say to them? Or if that is hard, imagine a child saying that stuff - how would you comfort them? I say this because again, these are things I am trying to do myself, as my internal talk is very harsh too.

 

[ms spock]

If none of us here ever expressed negative feelings, the forum would not exist! Instead of the smack to the head, read your posts imagining someone else wrote them - what would you say to them? Or if that is hard, imagine a child saying that stuff... as my internal talk is very harsh too.

Very good point macca.

 

[billie]

Nomedic we are only human. You being hard on yourself is a normal response to PTSD, especially whilst processing trauma. We are here for you unconditional, but we are also here to point out conflicting thoughts and to say its okay to have a bad week. you are a wonderful person and you deserve to get through this. (((Hugs))).

 

[kittiekittie]

If you are in therapy - one thing that really helped me was when my therapist would call me out every time I said something negative about myself. I did not realize how much I put myself down until this happened. If your internal voice keeps telling you these things, looking at books about self compassion and self love could be helpful. It's tough when you see yourself this way, but I am betting no one else around you agrees with you! You are not a bad person.

I also put up a wall hanging up in my home in a very visible area that says, "You as much as anyone else in the universe deserve your love and affection."

I know it sounds kind of dumb, but it really has helped when I am having a crummy day when I am excessively hard on myself. If you have trouble saying nice things to yourself, just repeating those words to yourself is a start.

 

[Marf]

I struggled with feeling like a bad person a lot. Two statements helped me: your behavior was learned from your role models, and you are identifying yourself with your abuser. Those two statements helped me not feel like a bad person, but an abused child.