Finding Meaning

[SimplyComplex]

I read once that finding meaning in one's experiences is part of recovery. I was wondering if anyone who has gotten to that level would like to share what they did that helped them find meaning? I am looking at all sorts of volunteer options but can't imagine actually doing them without being triggered...or questioning my ability to even be of help because I feel "broken". I guess it is a good sign I have more work to do, but would love to see how other people translated this step in their recovery?

 

[Lionheart]

Coming to this forum and sharing my hope and experience with others has helped give meaning to my recovery. When I am down, it gives others the opportunity to be strong by supporting/encouraging me, and sharing their experiences.

When I am doing well, it raises my self-esteem to help others and it gives a positive spin to what has otherwise been a negative experience. I find understanding here and unconditional acceptance which helps me to love myself unconditionally and hopefully others are enjoying this same benefit.

It reminds me of the time 5 people sat down to eat at a table that had really long spoons. They couldn't feed themselves and all were about to starve to death until they realized that the solution was to feed one another. :)

 

[revelry]

It reminds me of the time 5 people sat down to eat at a table that had really long spoons. They couldn't feed themselves and all were about to starve to death until they realized that the solution was to feed one another. :)

:speechless:

 

[The Albatross]

Movement in any direction is progress .... that's what I tell myself when I attempt to break out into something new. I just dare or challenge myself enough to try. Some things stick, some things don't... some things I am suited for, some things not. All I knew was I if I wanted something to change, I needed to move. When I moved, the scenery changed, and I learned more about myself and my abilities... where I am successful and where I need some more work to be where I want to be.

I just keep stretching the boundaries.... eventually as I'm more comfortable the right thing will appear. First I was isolating in my own home... then I added a gym. Then I added a couple volunteer commitments, then I got a part time job... then I had two part time jobs. Now I'm taking a break from one job... and doing the pool stuff... but I told my shrink I was having difficulties, because it was uncomfortable ... two facilities are out of town. So... now I'm challenging myself to get used to traveling to near by towns... instead of keeping my whole life in a 3 mile triangle. If I'm comfortable, I'm not recovering or challenging myself enough. I keep the pressure on, and when I get comfortable, I look to up the ante.

 

[SimplyComplex]

Thats good advice Alby. I have had the issue of both staying over busy (age 17-21,age 27-32) and isolating (age 15-17 and 21-27). Both happen to be isolating as staying busy keeps you from having to get close to people too, or so T seems to indicate. I dont think I am isolating right now, I am weary of taking on too much. I get bored and then I take on a big project and then I have to choose between it and therapy/staying healthy/getting healthy...of course getting healthy wins. But I go to the gym, have a small business (but haven't been working much), take care of the family, go to church, the pool, kick around...I guess I stay busy.

I changed my whole life though with a list of uncomfortable things. I made this long list of scary things to do and did them in order of least scariest. Therapy was pretty late on the list, esp cause I was going to pick a female therapist! I guess I still have some stuff on the list i haven't gotten to...

dentist
get my knee checked
need another physical

... I think there were more...

 

[missd84]

I admire your dedication to completing your list of uncomfortable things. Seems like a great idea!

 

[SimplyComplex]

thanks, it changed my entire life. I wasn't isolating in the sense of not going out much...I was out every day all day. But I wasnt doing any self care what so ever. No doctors, no exercise, no me time. I just filled my life with focusing on other people. It would have killed me. I dropped a lot of weight, got fit, got in therapy, started yoga, go to the doctor, started getting hair cuts and nails done and am training for a 10k. Started boxing and shopping at clothing stores that used to scare me. I got my business looking more professional, although I still really fear failure so I don't try that hard. I cut out a ton of friends and am still working on that...I guess I am down to a very small handful. But I chose friends who used me or were also disordered, so cutting back was important.

Still lots to do, but it isn't a race

 

[Ron]

I searched for meaning for years and years and asked "why" ? But one day the answer came and it was so simple. I was human, and I had an accident. I lost concentration and I lost my train of thought. Everything was going against me that day. And I was perfectionistic back then. I was trying to make an imperfect day perfect. Everything was coming together for a disaster.
I am much stronger now.

 

[revelry]

missd84
Maybe you should start a thread on 'uncomfortable things to overcome.......nothing too in depth, but something like '100 things i like about me'
I know, I would have my own to add, even though they can be hard to choke down... :-)