Frustration Of Therapy

[Lucycat]

These past couple of months my T has been much more organised. At the end of one appointment he has set the next one. I so much prefer it like that. Even if he says a day but unsure of the time until nearer the time, that is fine by me. At least I know how many days or weeks until the next session. I am wondering if he will go back to his old ways though, once he is comfortable that I am back at work and stable there?

I do understand that some of this is about dependency, and I don't want to be dependent on T. But I am. That is fact until such time as I no longer need therapy.

 

[anndeb]

Yes, we are dependent on our therapists and need to be that way at least to a certain extent for the treatment to work I think.. Without some kind of positive bonding and trust in this very special relationship there can't be much ability for us to be open or vulnerable in the way we need to be .. For us to be able to say the things that need to get said in order for healing to begin. Or so it seems to me.

I have a regular weekly time for my appointments and yet each time when the session is ending I need to reassure myself that there will be another time available for me.. by asking for it. Otherwise I am reluctant to leave the office! And when I am focused on the assurance of another time to come I become empowered to leave gracefully and with much more confidence.

My therapist encourages me to make the best possible use of the time outside of our times together, when I cope without her. And I have learned at least as much that way as I have when we are together in session. So the dependency is also used in a constructive way to gradually bring about more independence and confidence in me. I am very fortunate to have such a good match, my T. and I. And I have grown and changed far more than I ever could have imagined possible in the time we have had together.

 

[ericaboo]

I realized recently that it's best to share these kinds of feelings with my therapist. I let him know how when I was in the waiting room I was feeling horrible and guilty and thinking about how awful it was going to be for him to have to deal with me. He reassured me, and also I now wait in the car until just a couple minutes before the session which helps.

Also, I worked with him to restructure our session so that the intensity is at the start, and can wind down toward the end - otherwise, I feel totally flooded and hyper-aroused when I walk out the door.

They can't help if they don't know how you're feeling about the situation. Also - the healing must happen within us outside of the session - the therapist can only point us in a direction... I keep telling myself that over and over to try to get past the intense attachment I tend to develop with people.

I have a general agreement to meet twice a week, but not a set day of the week or time - it varies, and I empathize with the insecurity of that. The feeling of isolation and alone-ness can blow up huge. I wouldn't get through it without meds.