Undiagnosed Hello fellow earthlings

Hallowean

Not Active
I don't feel unsafe, I feel tortured. I am definitely not making a mountain out of a mole hill and not self diagnosing. I'm sure there have been many insignificant/unworthy posts here.

Here is a snipet from the link I posted earlier. Take from it what you will.

When the federal government wanted to push the Branch Davidians to the breaking point in the siege at Waco, they bombarded them with sound, including the sounds of animals in distress. When the U.S. military wanted to drive Manuel Noriega from his sanctuary in Panama, they used the same strategy, because they knew that chronic noise is an intolerable irritant that drives people frantic.
To add...I do not believe I am personally under attack because other neighbors are suffering from it as well. It is just all of the noise and inconsideration from owners...a form of abuse from owners and loss of peace due to their carelessness. It also doesn't help that German Shepards are one of the loudest breeds and there are 5 of them in total. Sometimes there are 10 dogs in total barking and then 11 when my own joins in from inside the house, which I quickly put a stop to. This is stuff that will drive a person mad. But as with anything else traumatic in life, no one can truly understand until they experience it for themselves.
 

Hallowean

Not Active
Right, but the barking dogs is the trigger. I do get it. Home life that doesn't feel safe? Can absolutely trigger ptsd, caused by prior traumatic events.

We do get folks come to the forum thinking that ptsd can be caused by all manner of stressful situations (the classic example being "I got ptsd from my goldfish dying"). There are plenty of people who have read a pop-psychology article and have concluded that, based on a huge misunderstanding of both ptsd and mental illness.

You don't need to list the traumatic events that may have caused your ptsd. I didn't say you don't have ptsd. But I'm definitely not a fan of pop-psychology. It tends to do the ptsd community, and the mental health community, an injustice.

The mantra for the forum here is "Take what's helpful, leave the rest".
I just now realized you are a moderator, sorry.
 

Sideways

Moderator
I just now realized you are a moderator, sorry.
All the moderators here are members first. So, I was a responding in that capacity. I have ptsd, and most of my replies to posts come from the space of being a sufferer, rather than a moderator.

That said, this place is full of different opinions. And support doesn't always come in the form of agreement. The Community Constitution is a good read to get a feel for the place. You don't need to apologise to me for disagreeing with me, and you definitely don't need to apologise to me because I'm a moderator.
 

Weemie

MyPTSD Pro
I feel tortured.

There's a realm of nuance in this particular situation. I've been tortured using noise as a stimulant before and being deprived of sleep. However, what made it torture wasn't precisely the noises being used, it was the environment that I was in and the purposeful induction of sound and sleep deprivation by others who were detaining me forcibly against my will.

Their desire was for me to suffer and the only reason why these noises were occurring was for the express purpose of causing suffering.

I have PTSD from legitimate torture and I can honestly say that if I had to endure 10 dogs barking nonstop in my house, because dogs are a trigger for me (they were utilized against me violently) would be completely intolerable. I would probably go insane and end up homeless as I have no monetary means to move out of this environment. I would not be able to tolerate that and I would have to go live on the streets.

So I think it comes down to acknowledging that this is a legitimate PTSD trigger while at the same time, being aware that this is not the same situation as prolonged auditory stimulation used in intentional torture. These words have meaning and it's important to be aware of that.

But I do understand the amount of distress that this situation can cause because I know for me, it would distress me beyond the realm of tolerability (due to my former experiences with dogs and torture).
 

Hallowean

Not Active
There's a realm of nuance in this particular situation. I've been tortured using noise as a stimulant before and being deprived of sleep. However, what made it torture wasn't precisely the noises being used, it was the environment that I was in and the purposeful induction of sound and sleep deprivation by others who were detaining me forcibly against my will.

Their desire was for me to suffer and the only reason why these noises were occurring was for the express purpose of causing suffering.

I have PTSD from legitimate torture and I can honestly say that if I had to endure 10 dogs barking nonstop in my house, because dogs are a trigger for me (they were utilized against me violently) would be completely intolerable. I would probably go insane and end up homeless as I have no monetary means to move out of this environment. I would not be able to tolerate that and I would have to go live on the streets.

So I think it comes down to acknowledging that this is a legitimate PTSD trigger while at the same time, being aware that this is not the same situation as prolonged auditory stimulation used in intentional torture. These words have meaning and it's important to be aware of that.

But I do understand the amount of distress that this situation can cause because I know for me, it would distress me beyond the realm of tolerability (due to my former experiences with dogs and torture).
I understand and thank you. Today I am literally ill from being woken up at 4am from one of them and it didn't stop for hours...luckily was able to get a bit more sleep tho. Right now it's quiet but I'm dreading when it starts back up for another few hours or so. My anxiety is thru the roof but I'm trying to continue remodeling my utility and kitchen.

I've never been held down and tortured, well with exception of my ex husband choking me 3 separate times for short spells. I'm very sorry for your tragic experiences and I hope you are getting well. I don't like for anyone to suffer, especially the helpless.

So a question for you, being they refuse to control their canines, would you say in a way they are purposefully torturing? Could it be, in your opinion, a form of abuse?

I am, I think, since being on here for a couple days now, that people on here are very sensitive and don't want anyone coming here to simply vent...I respect that. It's not my intention to pretend I have PTSD (which I likely do but have never strived for a diagnosis, for one thing I don't trust doctors or counselors etc for particular reasons I will be happy to share if interested). My life hasn't been as difficult as some others but it's been more difficult than some others as well. I don't plan on going to get a diagnosis of anything because I thrive everyday knowing that God is always with me, He is my physician and counselor, the past stays mostly behind.
 

Weemie

MyPTSD Pro
So a question for you, being they refuse to control their canines, would you say in a way they are purposefully torturing? Could it be, in your opinion, a form of abuse?

I think this is somewhat semantic. Their lack of desire to control their canines is not a deliberate desire to abuse you. Your distress is probably incidental to their motivations, which likely arise from lack of responsibility && knowledge, and a fundamental laziness/entitlement.

The exception would be their expressed intent to cause you harm, in which case this would be abusive (but in my opinion not rise to the level of torture, as torture is a specific legal term).

with exception of my ex husband choking me 3 separate times for short spells.

That is regretful and I am sorry it occurred to you. My suspicion is that this incident is triggering the helplessness that you did experience while enduring a crit A trauma (choking, intimate partner violence). Scenarios that induce helplessness are very big PTSD triggers.

It's important to be aware that you feel abused and tortured as a result of this occurrence but that it is not the same as being deliberately targeted for violence.
 

Hallowean

Not Active
Great info, you seem to be very wise of the human mind. I think since this has been going on for so long as well it has def set in helplessness, not just to myself but other neighbors as well. I posted my first YouTube video of dogs today and it helped relieve some stress. Last thing I want to do is harp on the subject and drive others nuts so documenting for one reason...proof I'm not insane.

I agree, if I had a choice of any kind of abuse I would choose this ordeal over your experiences for sure...just straight matter of fact. Movies such as hostel would be 100% torture and I don't doubt it happens in real life. The sex trafficking is a worldwide problem that I believe the govs play a big part in. Evil is most certainly abound.
 

Hallowean

Not Active
All the moderators here are members first. So, I was a responding in that capacity. I have ptsd, and most of my replies to posts come from the space of being a sufferer, rather than a moderator.

That said, this place is full of different opinions. And support doesn't always come in the form of agreement. The Community Constitution is a good read to get a feel for the place. You don't need to apologise to me for disagreeing with me, and you definitely don't need to apologise to me because I'm a moderator.
I do understand that. If I had realized at first I would have replied in a different way. You were wanting to know if I have ptsd basically and wondering if I belong here. As I've stated on here it's likely I do but the reason I joined isn't because I think I have it or for ptsd support...but when it boils down to it, maybe I do...I don't know. I do know I have endured forms of trauma....even a car wreck at 19 where I was knocked out and dislocated shoulder. Many other physical injuries. Also heartbreak, sibling bullying my entire youth. If I'm allowed to stay here I may even make a list of things that have been hurtful in my life but in my opinion it will never compare to someone who has been to war or a POW, been raped and trafficked,, held captive and starved, etc etc.

Thank you for replying and the info.
 

Weemie

MyPTSD Pro
Movies such as hostel would be 100% torture and I don't doubt it happens in real life. The sex trafficking is a worldwide problem that I believe the govs play a big part in. Evil is most certainly abound.

Indeed so, but I would encourage you not to use the statistics of sex trafficking (nor indeed my own history) to discount your experiences. Especially and primarily such as these ones:

a car wreck at 19 where I was knocked out and dislocated shoulder. Many other physical injuries. Also heartbreak, sibling bullying my entire youth.
ex husband choking me 3 separate times for short spells
such as physcal abuse and other physical injuries.
ex husband slamming my face into a door facing busting my left eye open

These are all violent and/or abusive experiences and that type of pain is just as legitimate as mine or anyone else's. Your distress over your neighbors is also legitimate, though I would venture that this (your emotional/physiological responses) is an effect of prior abuse (of which PTSD is certainly a realistic outcome) rather than a cause.
 

Hallowean

Not Active
Indeed so, but I would encourage you not to use the statistics of sex trafficking (nor indeed my own history) to discount your experiences. Especially and primarily such as these ones:






These are all violent and/or abusive experiences and that type of pain is just as legitimate as mine or anyone else's. Your distress over your neighbors is also legitimate, though I would venture that this (your emotional/physiological responses) is an effect of prior abuse (of which PTSD is certainly a realistic outcome) rather than a cause.
That makes sense to me because I do feel I'm the one most affected by this mess. Everyone else seems to be living their lives while I "let" it eat at me.
 
Top