How close is too close

[katz]

There is a area called "the comfort zone". I have noticed this for most of my life, so don't be hard on yourself for needing it. I also know that this "zone" is different in many cultures. Watch for it in different shows about people around the world and you will notice it as being different almost everywhere.

I am in no way excusing him. What he did is horrible and very rude. I just don't want you to think bad of yourself for feeling this. It's perfectly normal to need this area of safety around you. Especially for us where personal safety is such an important part of our lives.

 

[Kay Mouse]

In general this lack of respect for personal space happens to me a lot, although I have noticed that many human beings seem to display a weird and slightly creepy lack of awareness regarding other people's personal space. Normally, I just move away, whilst stifling the urge to shout at them.

 

[Abstract]

Well done for dealing with that so well!

I agree that culture plays a part. We of course still get the right to decide what our comfort zone is. Mine varies quite a lot dependent on how symptomatic I am. Unfortunately the London tube system isn't the kindest in this regard. There are certainly those who are testing the water so to speak. Absolutely hate men right behind me though so with you on that.

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

I also have to stifle the urge to scream at them..."BACK OFF!!!"

 

[Deleted member 44579]

Well done for dealing with that so well!

I agree that culture plays a part. We of course still get t...

Hi @Abstract.. Oh I don't think I could handle the London tube.... Or London cone to think of it... I admire you for being able to.
I cycle.. Mostly because it's just me and my bike.... Nobody sitting beside me.. Not feeling caged in... You know....

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

I agree that I wouldn't be able to ride the London tube! :nailbiting:

I learned to allow people a LITTLE closer when I married a Greek! They hug "hello", "goodbye", and every other chance they get!

If I am the one stepping forward to give the hug it's better. I will take a couple steps back if someone comes to hug me... Unless I see them coming.

 

[Abstract]

Hi @Xena
I think cycling sounds like a very good alternative in so many ways. Well done to you. I contain the tube thing a few ways. Go off peak. Make sure I get a seat (although that can have its own challenges). Whats worse for me is standing and when someone is behind me so try to make sure my back is against something as unpleasant as it can be to have someone right in front of me. Try to stand in front of the door if have to stand but have had one really horrible experience doing that. Don't know how I contained myself.

Yes Angelkeeper! Greece and other countries including Africa. Its a bit like speaking another language in a nin verbal way isn't? You have to try to take it in context but unfortunately triggers have a language of their own.