How does seeking abuse fit with Avoidance symptoms?

[Dark.Green.Feathers]

I didn't know how to properly word the title. What I was trying to ask was sometimes, people with PTSD go back towards things similar to their trauma (eg. dysfunctional relationships after experiencing abusive ones). Why does this happen when Avoidance is a key symptom? Why does the brain gravitate to a negative environment after trauma sometimes?

 

[Dark.Green.Feathers]

Can someone think of a better title? I couldn't manage the words.

 

[Weemie]

Avoidance and immersion are both common responses to PTSD. Avoidance is only one of the diagnostic criteria and you don't need every single criteria to qualify as PTSD. You can also avoid some triggers but immerse in others. For example I avoid sex, but I play shooter games all the time. I have trauma from both rape and armed violence. It's just how my brain tweaked. When I was younger I also sought out risky sexual situations and I would avoid relationships. Essentially both avoiding and immersing. Humans are complex!

 

[Movingforward10]

i think your title works well the way it is.

I think for me it was to prove nothing happened, and that if it did happen, it was all me. And seeking out familiarity. But a lot of it wasn't fully conscious.

 

[BuildingSelf24]

There are parts of us that are kind of stuck replaying the memories of the trauma. I think those parts would gravitate towards repeating those experiences since they are already stuck in a loop of repeating them. I think our conscious selves would want to avoid the experience because we know it is bad and we don’t want it to happen again.

 

[Dark.Green.Feathers]

Avoidance and immersion are both common responses to PTSD. Avoidance is only one of the diagnostic criteria and you don't need every single criteria to qualify as PTSD. You can also avoid some triggers but immerse in others. For example I avoid sex, but I play shooter games all the time. I have trauma from both rape and armed violence. It's just how my brain tweaked. When I was younger I also sought out risky sexual situations and I would avoid relationships. Essentially both avoiding and immersing. Humans are complex!

Thank you, I didn't know about immersion.

i think your title works well the way it is.

I think for me it was to prove nothing happened, and that if it did happen, it was all me. And seeking out familiarity. But a lot of it wasn't fully conscious.

I understand. I found it hard to adjust to not being in my abusive situation. I am still finding it. I didn't like it, but it was always the same, I think that's why it felt comfortable but awful at the same time.

 

[Friday]

Those who don't study the past are condemned to repeat it?

 

[Friday]

Seriously, though, I don't think it falls under avoidance much, if at all. Sure, some pieces for some people... thrill seeking comes to mind, deploying comes to mind... but not as a general rule.

 

[Dark.Green.Feathers]

Seriously, though, I don't think it falls under avoidance much, if at all. Sure, some pieces for some people... thrill seeking comes to mind, deploying comes to mind... but not as a general rule.

I was hoping you'd reply. Deploying?

 

[Friday]

I was hoping you'd reply. Deploying?

A lot, to possibly most, combat vets with PTSD? Become asymptomatic once deployed.

There's the reverse "kind" where people crack up in the field, but get better at home, that saw hundreds of British soldiers shot for cowardice during WWII. Sent home the first time to recuperate, deemed fit for combat & sent back, but the second time they lost it they were executed.

PTSD just kinds sorta seems to split that way?

Some people just seem to adapt so completely to life threatening situations, that returning to 'normal' f*cks them up. The suicide rate for retirement is higher than for any group that's survived teenage years... but the suicide rate for retiring from trauma jobs? (Military, police, fire, ems, certain kinds of journalism, etc.?) Is ASTRONOMICAL.

Whilst others becomes so hypersensitive to trauma that even normal life stressors break them (and I don't mean in the way pretty much everyone with PTSD periodically loses it because the toilet paper roll is on "backwards", or stress Cup stuff with weddings/births/funerals. But full on psychosis & worse).

PTSD does that a lot... 180 degrees difference in RESPONSE to the same symptom or stimuli. (Fight/ flight/ freeze/ etc) being a great example.

So SOME PEOPLE, as long as they stay IN trauma seem to avoid the whole 'post trauma' bit, whilst others just get worse and worse and worse (until psychosis).

So IDFK why, but for the IN TRAUMA = PEACE crowd? It sure as hell avoids all the post trauma fallout & predicts where they're going to point their professional & personal lives. High Octane Adrenaline Fueled work/play.

BUT? That's only one subset of PTSD.

 

[Charbella]

My T says it’s because lots of us crave predictability.

Makes complete sense to me because I do crave predictability. I crave knowing what will happen next so I can fix it. Childhood skill was immensely helpful, now it’s just ingrained.

 

[Brumbyinthesunshine]

I think that's why it felt comfortable but awful at the same time.

Correct me if I am wrong - but this has a vague similarity to whats termed Stockholm syndrome.
Only drew a connection to it at random.