Childhood How Many Of Us Tried To Kill Ourselves As Toddlers?

[PTSDfree]

Was just thinking about this earlier. I jumped out of the window and a bunch of other things as a kid and never got any help for it, aside from seriously hurting myself and getting fixed up for a bit at the hospital. As far as my parents were concerned, I was just being a normal kid (on top of trying to drown younger children at school and banging my head on the wall for hours on end). :yuck:

 

[trying2movefwd]

Not as a toddler, but as a kid and teenager I came close several times.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I did at age 8. I wasnt a toddler but young enough that i shouldnt of known what killing oneself was let alone having suicidal thoughts.

I jumped off of my 1 story roof. I didnt even break a bone but the intent was to die. Was just too young to know how to.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

banging my head on the wall for hours on end

That I did A LOT as a kid. Self injury started around age 6 or 7 and with self injury came slamming my head against the wall and pressing my eyes in so long everything went black for mins at a time.

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

I was twelve. Also had no idea how to properly die, so I didn't even end up injured, although the intent was definitely there.

 

[joeylittle]

I was 8 when I started writing and debating with myself about it and 10 when I tried. I still have a great deal of shame about it. About failing.

 

[Miaoqing]

I don't know if I ever acted on it or not, but starting around 8 or 9 I definitely had the desire to kill myself, mainly by jumping out of a window. Self-harm-wise, I started to bite my hands and wrists when I was particularly upset around this time as well, and wanted to cut myself but never actually acted on it. I don't know if I tried anything as a toddler, though, although I would often lash out and attack other children. I wouldn't be surprised if I did have suicidal ideations. I wonder why this is so common among child abuse victims? Hm.

 

[Gs172003]

I was twelve. Also had no idea how to properly die, so I didn't even end up injured, altho...

I was put in a hospital for being suicidal at that age.

 

[Heather]

In 2nd grade my mom told me school had me on suicide watch...they were afraid I'd throw myself off the jungle gym.

 

[Gs172003]

My brother did things at all ages. Not because he was suicidal but because he was impulsive. He didn't think about what he was doing, he just did. Very very ADHD.

 

[Leni]

Thanks to this thread I just remembered the intense feeling of shame I had when the police and by extension my mom ... and possibly others ( I, in my innocence and naiveté thought everyone knew) found out about my abuse.

I remember wanting to disappear. I remember wanting it to end. Forever. I wasn't aware at that point of the possibility of killing myself. I was 9-ish?

The same feeling returned just a few years later when I realised it was happening again ...

And then when it happened yet again and that's when I actually contemplated jumping out of a window and killing myself ... but I was 16 then.

I guess I'm a late bloomer, to use some very dark humor ...

 

[Ronin]

As a toddler, wouldn't know. What I remember of that time are mostly fragments and what other people did and what I thought in very simple terms and the running.

Later on, yes. Then it occured to me there are more scared kids around and while I'm scared, they're bugf*ck terrified, so I better suck it up and go ask someone who's yet less scared what we do.