How To Help Him

[jen14]

I wrote asking if I should stay in a relationship with my boyfriend of 2 years (retired army, ptsd sufferer) or walk away. It hasnt been an easy journey and I was at a loss. Those of you that responded said only I know when I need to walk away and you are right. Thank you for your kind words and help. I have decided that I can't walk away from him. If I truely love him I have to be here when he needs me. I know its not easy but walking away wouldnt be easy either.

That being said Im wondering if anyone has any advice for me. What do I need to do to give him all the help I can?

 

[Changing4Best]

Sometimes you need to back away, give him some space and leave it in God's hands. That part might be the hardest. However, we PTSDers sometimes just need some time to ourselves, especially if we ask for it. On the other hand we sometimes need a helping hand, an understanding shoulder or a hug. We cry sometimes, yes, even men. Another thing you can do for yourself and your own sanity is to read this thread: https://www.myptsd.com/threads/you-know-you-have-ptsd-when.8872/ . It will give you some idea of all the different kind of things that plague us.

 

[Friday]

The Ideal Carer

Things To Know When Dealing With PTSD (As a Carer)

These 2 threads might be quite helpful for you to read, if you haven't, yet! :)

 

[jen14]

I have taken a step back and am giving him his space and yes that is the hardest part. This site has helped me so much to understand better and do the best I can for him. Thank you all so much for the helpful advice!

 

[Sweetpea76]

Research research research... it helps to understand what is going on before you can decide what to do. I find it very comforting too.

 

[jen14]

I'm doing as much research as possible. I'm reading everything I come across to try to better understand his situation. In the mean time I've let him know that I'm here if he needs me but I've given him space to do what he needs to do.

 

[Recovery4Me]

@jen14 Your post #6 is strong advice for any type of relationship! (((hugs))) if you accept.

 

[jen14]

@Recovey4Me Thanks so much! All hugs and support is greatly appreciated. This is not an easy situation but this site and everyone on it makes it a little easier!