General Husband In Treatment But Keeps Shutting Down Constantly

[Nerilee]

Hi,
I'm not quite sure what to do. My husband is in treatment seeing a psychologist every week and a psychiatrist fortnightly. Every week he comes out of these sessions in a great head space and excited for the week and wanting to make changes. By the very next day he is way out of this head space. He is rude, arguing, agressive for hours on end and then will sleep for the rest of the day.

It seems everything from the day before is gone and he is back in his bad dark place.

All the long timers on this forum say to set boundaries and be firm, etc. Do you mean to say sleeping all day is not acceptable?

He is not actively participating in his treatment. I know I can't make him but how can I encourage him to do it without him cracking it (I dont want to tip toeing on egg shells!)

Many thanks in advance

 

[Dropkick_Molly]

Are you able to go in and talk with his psychologist? I mentioned this to my husband, as I didn't want him to feel like a breach of trust between him and the doctor he sees, and he actually agreed it would be a good idea. We are also setting up some joint counseling sessions.

As for the sleeping all day, my husband does that as well. I have found, if he is productive at school (He's going to become a licensed massage therapist), and he doesn't have anything he HAS to do, then I just let him sleep. Sometimes I try and come up with fun, calming activities for us to do, like set up a movie night, or pizza in bed. Something small.

I've discovered, from watching my husband, and from being a sufferer myself, PTSD is exhausting. Going to a counseling session can pump you up, but once all the "change to come" hits you, it feels as if it is just overwhelming and there is SO far to go. Sometimes I feel like I'll never get better.

What has helped me is taking smaller steps, not biting off more than I can chew.

I hope some of this makes sense, or helps a little. :)

 

[discarded]

I broached the subject of speaking to his psychiatrist and he hit the roof. Said it was none of my business and to just butt out. I suspect it is because he isn't able to be honest in his sessions and he will be found out.

He works long hours, more than he has to for a department that assists defense members with rehab and benefits, so by the time he comes home he is stressed and warn out. He hits the drink, sits in his chair in his own part of the house watching and sleeping through repeated programmes on foxtel.

We generally leave him in peace and he will go to bed when ever he wakes and then can't settle back to sleep. Weekends he often sleeps on and off all day but always in his chair with the tv on. It is hard to watch but harder to broach the subject with him. I wish you luck.