sonickel77
Bronze Member
After a few months of relative peace, getting on with study and doing well, my PTSD has resurfaced.
I developed PTSD because of
1. a childhood marked by physical and emotional abuse and neglect, and
2. being caught in the middle of a protest against the Woomera detention centre for refugees, where I was surrounded by riot cops in the middle of the desert, unable to escape.
For years I could not watch TV, was frightened of horses (they were used to charge at groups of protesters) and angry at cops, and became suicidal and reclusive.
With the persecution of refugees by both Labor and Liberal parties, and more recently, by the election of the far-right wing Tony Abbott, my PTSD has gone into overdrive.
I fear that my pension will be reviewed and taken from me, that I will be forced into unsuitable "work for the dole" programs, that I will lose $10,000 in income a year, as well as all concessions. I fear that I will have to give up heating/ cooling, my car, my fridge, and hot running water, and that I will have to eat weeds to survive.
I've developed an obsession with checking the electricity meter every couple of hours, fretting over every kwh, and making plans to disconnect my fridge. I became adversarial with conservative family members on Facebook, blocking them altogether because they were insulted with my left-radical political bias, and told me to "just get a job". A couple of my assignments are overdue, and I just cannot think about anything right now, except survival strategies. I've spoken to the Disability officer, who has made me an access plan, but can't guarantee that the lecturers will take my PTSD into consideration, or give me extra time to do the work.
It's distressing that I've relapsed so severely, and in such a short space of time. I'd hoped that I was over this thing. Now I fear that I will never work again and that study is futile.
:(
I developed PTSD because of
1. a childhood marked by physical and emotional abuse and neglect, and
2. being caught in the middle of a protest against the Woomera detention centre for refugees, where I was surrounded by riot cops in the middle of the desert, unable to escape.
For years I could not watch TV, was frightened of horses (they were used to charge at groups of protesters) and angry at cops, and became suicidal and reclusive.
With the persecution of refugees by both Labor and Liberal parties, and more recently, by the election of the far-right wing Tony Abbott, my PTSD has gone into overdrive.
I fear that my pension will be reviewed and taken from me, that I will be forced into unsuitable "work for the dole" programs, that I will lose $10,000 in income a year, as well as all concessions. I fear that I will have to give up heating/ cooling, my car, my fridge, and hot running water, and that I will have to eat weeds to survive.
I've developed an obsession with checking the electricity meter every couple of hours, fretting over every kwh, and making plans to disconnect my fridge. I became adversarial with conservative family members on Facebook, blocking them altogether because they were insulted with my left-radical political bias, and told me to "just get a job". A couple of my assignments are overdue, and I just cannot think about anything right now, except survival strategies. I've spoken to the Disability officer, who has made me an access plan, but can't guarantee that the lecturers will take my PTSD into consideration, or give me extra time to do the work.
It's distressing that I've relapsed so severely, and in such a short space of time. I'd hoped that I was over this thing. Now I fear that I will never work again and that study is futile.
:(
