I'm just like this actually, my aggression is the only thing that helps me survive. Relentless attention to detail and control over every possible variable that I can. One slip up and everything will catch up to me. I'm in a perpetual loop of aggressive progress, crashing, and mania. It gets much smoother in the Summer though when at least the air outside isn't hostile and I have so much more space. I often need to be my own support net but I have at least online gotten more friends lately.