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Supporter I’ve learned a tremendous amount about ptsd, so now i’m ready to support my ex if he returns.

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Deleted member 44240

It’s aleays so hard to really explain the amount of pain I endured for the past four months. My ex partner (sufferer) and I started dating last December 2016, and we enjoyed getting to know each other on a daily basis. He explained that he suffered with ptsd from csa; my reply was very nonchalant because due to my ignorance, I didn’t know what to do or to expect. After he isolated the first time ( I took it very personally ) he came back after a couple of days. He went into a treatment for a couple of weeks back in April and it seemed to help a little. He doesn’t have regular therapy due to him not feeling as if he really is benefitting from it.

He moved in with me on the first of August ( I lost my job on the 12th and he moved on the 18th upon breaking up ) only to go back to his abusive ex. In September, he needed me to help him with filing a PTO against his ex because he thought that he was stalking him, so I did. Due to the court case being dismissed, he found convoluted reasons for me not supporting him through the whole ordeal and broke it off again. Although he didn’t want me to relocate out of town because he needed me in his life, he still couldn’t commit to me. Since October, we have maintained a very close friendship and I’ve been there for him whenever he needed me; he needed me again in November with wanting to drop from school due to convoluted reasons with the staff, so I did help him with that. About a week after assisting him with leaving his school, he came to my home and had ( What I Call a very disturbing and confusing conversation with me about what I’ve done wrong ); eventually telling me why he couldn’t be with me. Right after Thanksgiving, he started to fade away into complete isolation.

Last week, I reached out to him and explained that I just wanted to check in and make sure he was ok; he did finally contact me back and stated that he was fine and that he needed a little more time and that he apologizes for not being able at the moment. I can only have hope that our friendship will repair itself one day soon and that he will see why I was trying very hard to do. I love him with all of my heart and although I know ptsd will be with him for the rest of his life, I am now educated enough to know how to help him with symptoms and what to do to help.
 
You and me both. Literally, i'm actively learning and these forums are actually helping. I think the best thing we can do is be there for them until they work through their own personal problems. I dont think we should push them in any direction, because that will make them go the opposite.

Sending many hopeful wishes your way
 
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