Ha! You pipped me at the post
@Larksong :). I was just about to write a similar message. This post has helped me understand things a bit better too (as a supporter). I feel like I have a reasonable (read: very vague) understanding of how it is for my man, but I feel like some days I constantly need to remind myself of what he's told me about what it's like for him, cos otherwise my own fears, anxieties, expectations of him, etc, etc take over and 'drown out' my (already limited) understanding.
That's just my own personal take on things and it probably sounds a bit loopy, but there it is (I have an anxiety disorder by the way, and that gets in the way a lot). But I do think that most people only have a limited capacity to understand (and empathise with) experiences that lie too far outside of their own experience (even when you tell them til you're blue in the face what it's like), and they will just default to the closest approximation. Cue annoying, punch-worthy comments. I know that I often default to thinking of things in terms of my own anxiety, and sometimes I automatically have thoughts pop into my head like "Well, I struggle with that too, so why is it so much harder for you?" Which is totally unfair (and I would never say that to him), but it's so hard to get your head around a beast like PTSD when you've haven't been there. I hope all that makes sense. I don't know if that perspective helps you any, but this post has helped MY perspective. So thanks for sharing ;).
I'm really sorry to hear that you are having a difficult time right now
@Fadeaway, and that you're not getting the support and understanding you need at the moment. I hope you are both able to work through it together :hug:
