I Cannot Tolerate One More 50 Shades Refrence, Just Me???

[Gibuz]

No sure about other places but 50 shades is due to be released in Europe this week. I literally cannot deal with seeing one more article, facebook post or news report on it. I don't know why I find this book and film so triggering, but I do. Even when the book came out and all the girls were reading it, just from the brief synopsis I had heard, I knew I never could. I fully respect other people's choice to read and watch what they like and I know there is probably a lot worse out there. The thing with this is that I just don't seem to be able to avoid this because of it's popularity. Sorry just needed to vent because nobody else really gets it. Sorry again, to anyone that shares my opinion - since I have just added to the posts about 50 shades. I think I should just go and hibernate until the hype has passed.

 

[Bohe]

I am with you on this one. I saw an ad for the movie on the internet today. I wan't to gag. I haven't read it, I won't watch it, and if anyone talks about it I let them know very clearly I am not interested.

 

[Dowuli]

Personally I think it's kinda messed up that people like it in the first place. I hope I don't come across as incredibly judgmental -I haven't read it. But I have only heard bad things about it, from perfectly normal people. Apparently there's a lot of sadistic stuff going on in that book and it's being equated to bdsm, when bdsm itself isn't actually about sadism and hurting people. That's what I heard.

I haven't read it because I think it would trigger me too.

 

[Gibuz]

Glad I'm not the only one but sorry you're affected by it too.

 

[Vuci]

Me too. Just seems like mindless crap to me. Kind of "I can't think of anything intelligent to write about, and I know that sex, especially of the kinkier kind, sells, so that's what I'll do." So of course they made a movie, cuz there's money to be made.

 

[Gibuz]

I've heard enough that it makes it angry, but I haven't read it so I don't feel I can have a discussion with people about it. I also know it probably won't do me any good. I've commented on news articles in the past about various subjects when I am annoyed at people's attitudes, particularly with regard to consent. While I can be articulate with my argument, I more often than not end up in a state myself :-(

 

[Wehuvo]

I have not read it but understand it to be fantasy, as many books are. I read books by Nancy Friday as a way to understanding my own secret thoughts. I am sure that's all the majority of readers see in it, pure fantasy.

 

[Juzome]

I don't think that everyone is going to see it as pure fantasy. Maybe I'll give myself away with this but I don't care.....its been brought up in chat a few times.....

The sad thing is that you will have young women watch it who think oh.....well this woman changed her man from a guy with "singular" tastes (ie only wants sex) to someone who wants more, and if I am good enough, then I can too! This is dangerous because women already equate sex with love more readily than guys do. You're going to have young women submitting to men who think this movie is an accurate portrayal of the submissive/dominant subculture when it is not. I was even told by someone else that he breaks the safe word rule.....this is NOT a rule to be broken as then it amounts to forced sexual......(fill in the blank).

That's enough of my ranting. Although I also heard that he forces her to give him her virginity? Again, just overheard. The previews are enough to make me gag.

 

[Kozoj]

Thank you for your insight. I have heard from young and old who have read the books and all relayed it as fantasy, but like anything, in the wrong hands, can give the wrong impression to those who are vulnerable and impressionable.

 

[Hefoco]

It's a romance novel. As real as any of them. Aka, not. Anyone who takes those seriously already has their own problems. Like people who take porn seriously. Or teenage mutant ninja turtles. It's just happened to come out when eReaders had hit critical mass (it was ePub only), and it had a thriller-looking cover, instead of bodice-ripper, so when it took off on the interwebz, it wasn't horribly embarrassing to transfer to print. So it managed to sweep both markets. Publishing has paid attention, the classic bodice-ripper is getting a new look. From Fabio to Minimalistic.

Are there people who take romance novels, porn, fantasy literally? Sure. But most people have at least a shred of common sense.

As far as themes... Beauty & the Beast. The poor naïve girl who wins the heart of the apparently brutal (but big softy beyond the rough exterior :rolleyes: ) wealthy prince-in-seclusion, . Nothing new here. Even in the world of no-such-thing-as-a-new-plot, this is a particularly tired one. Both in Lit, as well as about 94% of the romance lit genre.

 

[Etep]

To be clear, stressors suck. Whether it's whips & chains or fluffy kittens. Stressor is a stressor. The common sense comment wasn't about dealing with stressors... It was about transferring the intense emotions surrounding a stressor to the general population / what are they going to "learn" from it... And slippery sloping from there. Problem with that is, GenPop doesn't take the whole thing seriously. It's taken as fantasy. So it ends up comparing apples to oranges.

 

[Gibuz]

I think as previous posts say it is a book that highlights a lot of issues with regards to consent and that people can find themselves in potentially harmful situations through naivety and/or not having the confidence to set and maintain boundaries (I don't necessarily mean progressing to BDSM). What I get upset with is some of the underlying attitudes to consent that I see when such discussions are raised. I'm not condemning the book, I just find it triggering and at the same time sometimes I feel compelled to point things out that I find worrying.