i feel like i need to talk about my trauma but im afraid of making other people uncomfortable, what should i do?

[hope4us]

i feel like i need to talk to people about it, but whenever the subject comes up im afraid to discuss it because im worried ill have a flashback and start hyperventallating which might scare people, or that my mind might go blank, and ill sit there in awkward silence and make people feel uncomfortable. what to do about this situation? should i not talk about it? or should i just try to discuss it anyway while i use grounding techniques?

 

[digger]

i feel like i need to talk to people about it,

When you say 'people', can you be more specific about who you mean? Are you talking about friends? Colleagues? Family? Professionals?

I think the 'who' makes a big difference.

 

[hope4us]

When you say 'people', can you be more specific about who you mean? Are you talking about friends? Colleagues? Family? Professionals?

I think the 'who' makes a big difference.

anyone, sometimes even friends

 

[Rumors]

anyone, sometimes even friends

I would limit that to professionals for now until you have a better feel for what sharing looks like. You are right in trying to figure out who is appropriate because not all people are. Good luck!

 

[DharmaGirl]

I second @Rumors. Friends and family aren't trained on how to hear and respond to trauma, and often say the "wrong" thing trying to soothe us. I only discuss trauma with my therapist, and a few things here in my journal. If it were a one time trauma thing like a car accident, or mugging, and it happened once, I probably would be more open to talking about it. I have complex trauma so I would feel like I'm injuring someone if I talked about it.

 

[joeylittle]

Agree with all. You'll want to get a bit of practice letting it out in environments where it's OK to get really upset, because the person listening has training in trauma support.

I'll add, though, that sharing with other people on this site by starting a trauma diary (Dead Link Removed can be a helpful part of that desensitization process. So, you might consider that.

(The link I shared, above, isn't the only way to do it - it's just one way, and it can be helpful, especially if you're not sure how to be productive with a trauma diary. You can also just start telling your story, lots of people do that as well).