I feel like I went from one processing addiction to another

[Luna_Moth]

Therapist: *tells me to focus on mindfulness meditations and the 5-4-3-2-1 technique*

Me: *tells her I struggle with internet addiction*

Therapist: *suggests I only spend 30 minutes of my time using social media*

Since I’ve gotten that down, I’ve experienced a lot of anxiety. Now I resort to workaholism and keeping my mind busy to distract from the anxiety and numb myself out. The whole reason I was doing those exercises was so I could nip my processing addictions in the bud. Instead I’ve resorted to something else just days after feeling anxious with the exercises. I still do them, but I feel like they’re ineffective now that I latched onto another unhealthy coping skill. I also overeat a lot to numb myself out. I don’t know how else to cope.

 

[Rose White]

I can relate to that whole replacing one with the other. It takes time to build up a routine and replacement behaviors/activities.

 

[Luna_Moth]

I can relate to that whole replacing one with the other. It takes time to build up a routine and replacement behaviors/activities.

Yeah I’ve only just started on DBT and had a handful of sessions with her. She’s an expert in treating trauma disorders. It’s just no wonder that I’m not ready for EMDR if I don’t have the right coping skills.

 

[Friday]

Learning those coping skills is a whomping large part of most kinds of trauma therapy.

 

[Luna_Moth]

Learning those coping skills is a whomping large part of most kinds of trauma therapy.

I guess I must have a long way to go if I’m already struggling with this. I really want to go through EMDR to really get into some deep level healing.

 

[Friday]

I guess I must have a long way to go if I’m already struggling with this. I really want to go through EMDR to really get into some deep level healing.

It took me yeeeeeears before my life was “stable” enough for trauma therapy.

I really rebelled against that. Like REALLY kinda lost my ever loving mind over it for awhile (that’s part of the ‘not stable’ thing), because the first time I dealt with my PTSD? There was no therapy. I did what I needed, when and as I could, so I was umpteen kinds of furious I was being pushed back. Like, FFS, I’m trying to do it the “right” way, the supposedly “faster” way… and we’re looking at YEARS??? He’ll no. There has to be a way around this BS.

Then??? I had this testifying-thing that meant I “had to” process this teeny tiny, itsty bitsy, part of my trauma history before testifying. With a few months of notice. The only reason the T was willing to do that with me? The alternative was either prison for life, or becoming a fugitive for the rest of my life, or do this thing. It was either go & testify, in a calm & reasoned manner, and MAYBE have a life, after… or??? Not. Just a few months of trauma therapy before I was stable enough to “do” trauma therapy? DID get me a couple of hours of calm/reasoned/intelligent testimony. And ATE the next 2-3 years of my life… in fallout. Completely predictable fallout. Still? Better than the next 50 years of my life.

 

[smithjhone]

That “I’ve just swapped one thing for another” feeling is honestly more common than people talk about.


It can be really disorienting when you step back from one processing habit whether it’s scrolling, overthinking, gaming, whatever and then suddenly notice your brain has just latched onto something else instead. Almost like it refuses to sit still in the quiet.


I’ve noticed (both in myself and from reading others’ experiences) that it’s not always the specific activity that’s the root problem, but more the need it’s temporarily filling like distraction, regulation, or just avoiding uncomfortable stillness. So when one outlet drops away, the mind quickly grabs the next available “safe” thing.


That doesn’t mean you’ve failed or gone backwards, even though it can feel like that. It’s more like your brain is still trying to solve the same underlying tension, just with a different tool.


Have you noticed if the “new” habit feels similar in the way it hooks you, or does it show up in a totally different way?