I Keep Hurting Myself Whilst Dissociated

[EveHarrington]

I think you need to take the chance and disclose what's going on as the alternative-----staying silent------could get you hurt or even killed. I don't mean to scare you, but in cases of severe symptoms such as this IMHO it's imperative that one gets local help. :hug:

 

[BuckarooBanzai]

As an ex-DIDer, I have a lot of personal experience with fugue states and such.

To dissociate and then seriously injure yourself - or put yourself into a questionable position where you could get hurt - tells me you are feeling totally overwhelmed right now. I would favor a short stay on a trauma unit.

Ben

 

[super_saiyan]

As an ex-DIDer, I have a lot of personal experience with fugue states and such.

To dissociate a...

In England I don't think we have any specialist trauma units. I know there's one in Scotland but I would never get the funding for that.

Am going to spend the day walking in nature, try to clear my mind and hopefully make this state stop.

 

[Megyn]

I refuse to take sleeping meds. I am on other meds but have been on the same ones for three years...

I have done this as well, very recently. It scared me very much so, but I was also scared to disclose for fear of being hospitalized. I eventually emailed my therapist with some of the details, not all. I had to promise a few things, but it's gotten WAY better. I was def reenacting but found a pattern in it. Once the memory was processed/exorcised, via the reenactment, I wouldn't find myself doing it again.

I hope therapy went well and that you are feeling a little better.

 

[BuckarooBanzai]

EMDR might help.

Ben

 

[super_saiyan]

Sorry to post again but I really need help.

This morning I have found that I have carved crucifix symbols into my stomach area. This is getting out of hand. On the weekend I was found on a crossbridge above a motorway. Don't think I had the intention of jumping or anything but my mind is literally blank. Please believe me when I say that I don't have recollections of consciously doing these things... I am so so so scared right now.

 

[BlueOrange]

I think the thing that is likely to be the most useful to you right now is someone to watch over you. I mean, literally, to be in the same room as you and looking at you. Please get in touch with the local psych emergency people, and tell them what you told us (show them the forum posts if that helps).

 

[BuckarooBanzai]

This morning I have found that I have carved crucifix symbols into my stomach area. This is getting out of hand. On the weekend I was found on a crossbridge above a motorwa

Yes this is difficult time for you, which is why I had recommended a short stay on a DID or trauma unit.

If you can't manage that for some reason, you could ask a friend or family member to watch over you, but that's a lot to put on a loved one.

Please get some help. You need a time out.

You might also try speaking aloud to the one who is cutting and causing other trouble. Speak audibly. Ask why he or she is doing this; say that you are here listening, and that you want to know what he or she has to say. Also, explain how these negative actions make things worse overall: "If you keep doing this, we will end up on a locked unit. Is that what you want?"; "We can't work when you do these things; we need to work to make money and buy food."

Ben

 

[super_saiyan]

I am being assessed under the mental health act today. Looking likely that I will be sectioned. This will make it 100x worse as acute units are not trauma-sensitive and do not deal with dissociative symptoms. I am absolutely terrified but powerless now.

 

[GWhizz]

I am being assessed under the mental health act today. Looking likely that I will be sectioned. Th...

I know it mustn't seem like it right now but at least you're safe getting help, even if not perfect help. Your life is really at risk. Hoping for a positive onward outcome for you.

Big hugs. Please be kind to yourself, this is not your fault. Keep us posted

 

[BuckarooBanzai]

I am absolutely terrified but powerless now.

We are rarely powerless.

Even on a locked acute care psych unit, one can have power in a safe and healthy manner. You do this by caring for yourself, and working with the professionals hand-in-hand with the understanding that you are an important part of the treatment team.

You are all partners working towards your health.

If they offer art, crafts, exercise, I suggest you go to every such session available to you.

Best wishes for a speedy recovery and safe return home!

Ben

 

[BlueOrange]

Thank you for doing the scary thing and arranging for people to help you avoid harm.