I'm Just Not Motivated

[Deleted member 1860]

You could tell them just what you told us.

 

[Healing Reins]

I don't know who to call.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I'm not sure of the help line in your state. Could you google it? I know my state has a helpline just for teens, too.

 

[Healing Reins]

There isn't one for my state

 

[Deleted member 1860]

You live in Oregon?

 

[Springer80]

I sometimes find that what we think is giving up or what feels like giving up doesn't always turn out to be that. Bulimia is a control thing, right. You're totally knackered by it physically, emotionally etc. You can't sustain what your doing or what it's doing to you. When you say give up, do you mean doing it more and more or something else undefined or unknown to you?

If it's the undefined/unknown conclusion you are heading towards because this may not be an option much longer, then that is scary and exhausting in itself.

Please rest yourself as much as you can, especially blaming yourself. That is very tiring.

Big lovely hugs and teddies XXXX

 

[SwordsPandaGirl]

Dont give up hun. Its difficult but not impossible. I may not have had bulimia (anorexia instead) but I have fully recovered, so it is not impossible. I also know another girl who had/has bulimia (we were going through it at the same time) she is on her road to recovery and is much better than she was back then. So please don't give up! It is possible to get better and I believe you can too.

 

[Deleted member 26920]

I'm sick all the time too-some sort of digestive-stomach thing that causes nausea and extreme pain/cramping/diarrhea almost 24 hours a day (doctors don't know what specifically it is, though they've found gastritis on my upper intestine and are continuing to poke and prod me with wonderfully invasive tests for a diagnosis...god bless being put under for the colonoscopy); there is never a time where I am without pain. I

know I can't relate to your exact situation, considering I don't have an eating disorder, but I can relate to this feeling of wanting to give up, feeling trapped. It's when everything just piles up and you're so tired of trying to handle it all... Though it may be hypocritical of me to say this, just keep trucking. It's absolute torture, I know, but the odds of things getting better are just too great to give up now. Last night you were talking about your plans for the future, your amazing, successful, fulfilling future. You'll get there, I promise. And when you do, it'll all be worth if. If you need someone to talk to, I am ALWAYS here for you. Truly.

 

[StellaBlue]

I'm giving up on trying to stop. It's too hard

I have recovered from bulimia. It is very hard but not impossible. For me, it helped to realize that it was a symptom of my PTSD - a coping mechanism. It might also help to try a "harm reduction" approach rather than full abstinence to start. And it might help to realize that there will be times (and it sounds like this is one of them), where you just need to sit on the floor and say "this sucks...I quit"...then you get back up and get back at it. I think you are reaching out by posting here...give yourself some credit for that.

 

[Healing Reins]

@StellaBlue how did you stop throwing up? Does it get easier?[DOUBLEPOST=1400805811,1400805698][/DOUBLEPOST]@Springer80 I mean to continue to throw up. That's my giving up.

 

[franciemarnie]

I don't have bulimia but I have electrolyte trouble. Drink Gatorade when you know your system is off. It will rebalance you.

Everyone else here has great advice.

 

[Justmehere]

@Healing Reins - I have read your trauma diary...

How is it working for you that you are not getting therapy for the eating disorder?

Is not getting treatment for both the ptsd and eating disorder working for you? You have been vomiting a lot of blood and have not stopped throwing up.

You had a therapist for the PTSD - but not one for the eating disorder, and it sounds like you are giving up on both options, right?

You have been going it alone without a therapist for the eating disorder for awhile, and I think it might be good to evaluate how that has worked so far.

If you are not ready to change, you are not ready. I'm very concerned about your choice, especially with the medical complications you have right now with your heart, but it is your choice to make -- until you get so sick someone makes the choice for you or you do die.

I am clear and blunt because I care.