I'm So Angry At My Shrink

[Powder]

Many T's have their own issues. Sounds like she really needs to think she's some gift to mankind, as a Narcissist.

It's very unbecoming. I'm glad it makes people mad. My mother is this way and people tend to play along and humor her. It's hard to be the child of someone like this and have people politely back away. I guess I identify with this woman's children.

I also find myself resorting to similar lofty tones, unconsciously, and I have worked on this. My parents thought they were so wonderful but were actually quite bigoted.

I do feel anger with her but I also feel sorry for people's families who don't realize their head is up their behinds. How sad for her kids. This is someone's mother. She's an "unlikely to improve" parent, as she's so "perfect" already (sighs). Poor kids can't just leave.

 

[sugnim]

Thank you, everyone, for your support. I ended up sending her an email explaining how I felt about what she said. She claims that it was all a misunderstanding, and that she did not mean those things at all. I don't see how what she said could be interpreted in any other way, but I'm willing to at least hear her out. I will meet with her again later this week. I figure that if nothing else, it can be an exercise in what to do with anger besides exploding or just walking away.

 

[Sideways]

I believe that it was an American that spoke once of being judged not by our race etc, but on the "content of our character". By all accounts, you are a remarkable and inspiring person.

 

[formicism]

@sugnim , excellent! If you're going to hear her out, might I suggest an inconspicuous voice recorder hidden in a pocket? The legality of recording without the other party's consent depends on your location, but regardless, having audio records of appointments can be an excellent aid to personal BS-detection. Best of luck, and let us know how it goes!

 

[sugnim]

So, I went back & saw my shrink. She says that I misunderstood her, and that she did not intend to say anything against me or against my family. She offered some explanations, and what she said sounded very different from what she had previously said. I'm not entirely sure that I follow her explanation, but it's a lot easier to just move on and try to take her at her word than it is to try to figure out what they heck happened.

She told me we should take a couple of weeks off. That was a little surprising since she had previously commented that since I had obtained useful insurance and could go every week, she was noticing marked improvement. Anyway, we don't have any more appointments scheduled. And I don't think I will be the one making the first call.

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Sounds like she realised what she said was discrimination, but, only because you drew her attention to it. I personally don't think I could go back to someone like her as I'd feel the damage is already done, working alliance ruptured big time, and wouldn't feel comfortable talking to someone like her.

 

[Deleted member 32731]

Yesterday, my shrink spent about 15 minutes talking about how my son needs a male role model to show him...

IMO, that was very unprofessional. I don't know what you discuss but I'm almost definitely sure you weren't bringing up whether or not your son needs a male role model (again, idk). The way she responded, that wasn't warranted. Honestly her personal views shouldn't be brought in this case, she should be helping you work through your problems. I wouldn't see her again, but that's just me.

 

[barefoot]

Hmm....I think her back-tracking and then suggesting taking a couple of weeks off sounds odd... Perhaps she's realised that she shouldn't have said what she did so is now trying to get herself out of it and cover her arse. But you don't sound convinced by her explanation (understandably!) so it looks like this may have drawn things to a close between you.

If this is it and you don't see her again, where does that leave you in terms of not having a therapist? Completely get that you're not keen to see her anymore (I wouldn't either and would have fired her) but I just wanted to check how you feel about being therapist-less. Will you look for someone else? Had this therapist actually been helping you/providing you with good support before she dropped this grenade a couple of weeks ago? If so, I'm sorry that this situation may have left you hanging...