Intense Focus On One Thing And Unable To Deal With Anything Else

[silkleaves]

I'm going through this right now, well...for the past few weeks really, and I'm curious to know if it's just my personality or anything to do with PTSD.

I find I go through moments when I can't focus...or maybe a better way to put it, can't devote my energy to more than one or two things at a time. For instance...I'm working on a freelance project, and ever since I started 2 weeks ago, I can't do anything else...I haven't cleaned, I haven't cooked, and besides this website, my email, and my work websites, I lost all energy / desire to anything else.

Also, about 3 weeks ago, a friends mom went into the hospital, and she was calling me every other day or so for support for about a week. I need major time to decompress after talking or even texting with anyone..at least a day or two, and that seriously burned me out. I haven't called or talked to any of my friends since then. I did "meet" a guy on POF a few days ago, and same thing now, I do like talking to him, but once I do, I need so much time to decompress, I still haven't gotten around to getting in touch with anyone else.

It could be anything though...I just get focused on one thing, and neglect everything else...or if its something that has to be done, like this project and supporting my friend, if I don't forget everything else, I burn out completely and then I'm completely useless...it doesn't take much of anything at all for me to burn out. I need so much time to recoup my energy to get back to normal.

Mind you, I do also have major depressive disorder, but I'm not so sure it's that. Can anyone relate to this, or is it just me?

 

[shimmerz]

I call that my OCD response and to me it usually means that I am triggering on something as opposed to the avoidance part of me that can't cook, struggle to shower, etc. Both can mean I am triggering but I have different reactions depending on what I am trying to do. I feel like the OCD response for me is me trying to prove something to myself or it can as well be a distraction from something I am trying to avoid.

 

[Go Hungry]

Can totally relate. Back before I got on my bipolar meds, I could fixate on something to the exclusion of all else. I simply WOULD. There were times when I couldn't even stop doing it long enough to have a normal conversation. I remember writing stories that I literally couldn't put down. I would even dream of them. So yes, extreme focus can be a thing. Although it's probably not such a bad thing if you write a lot. It can be good to be excited about something. Then again, the not cooking or cleaning thing.. not so much. But I have periods where I don't do that too much either. I managed to clean the bathroom this weekend and counted it a major victory. Heh.

It may be something you want to bring up to your doctor though; if it turns out that you're having manic states, then there are good things to take care of that. And it helps alot with your PTSD, as you can relax alot more once you get used to the loss of turbo focus.

 

[GWhizz]

I can NEVER focus on more than one thing at once, but I guess maybe that's just my personality lol.

I get totally consumed by parenting, cleaning, working, studying etc. My partner tells me to concentrate more on enjoying my hobbies etc but I can't when I need the time to do something else. I have tried to become better at 'multi-tasking' my life, hobbies, interests etc but I don't get much joy out of being this way. I rather compartmentalize things - I guess my brain just works better this way.

Like you, I find it heavy going with friends at times. So I've started only meeting with them for specific timeframes eg. 2hrs max rather than possibly all day which totally wore me out and left me with no 'me-time'. I used to feel rude cutting off people after a limited time, but you have to put yourself 1st.

 

[UnWindingEons]

For me, before I was in therapy, I would fixate on video games. I realized at some point that I was choosing video games because I felt like I was consistently successfully accomplishing things and that made me feel good. I don't do that anymore. It just sort of stopped because I feel better about my life.

One thing I noticed was that I wasn't celebrating any successes and not playing enough. Now that I spend time playing and having fun and noticing when I succeed and basking in it, I don't focus like nuts on something.

I also focus intently on something I am angry about but feel unsafe to bring up. So I ruminate over someone not helping me with chores even though it's his turn to help. I don't want to rock the boat so I stay silent. Old habits. Hang in there. That you are paying attention to your feelings and noticing them is important and good work.

 

[shimmerz]

I realized at some point that I was choosing video games because I felt like I was consistently successfully accomplishing things and that made me feel good.

Good one! Hadn't thought of that! Thank you @UnWindingEons.

 

[silkleaves]

I managed to clean the bathroom this weekend and counted it a major victory. Heh.
It may be something you want to bring up to your doctor though; if it turns out that you're having manic states, then there are good things to take care of that.

I feel you on the major victories! I did manage to wash my dishes...well half of them (I have no dishwasher, so I have to hand wash, and my sink is small!) so I did one load and I felt like a champion because now we weren't *totally* out of dishes and silverware! LoL

I havn't been back to therapy since Nov, working my nerve up to try and see what I can do about going back. But still not quite ready. I was kicked out of the program for not showing up...and I feel awful for taking away the space from someone who is ready and would show up every week just because I couldn't bring myself to leave the house. I'm not entirely sure I wouldn't do that again, so not taking the chance just yet.

I have tried to become better at 'multi-tasking' my life, hobbies, interests etc but I don't get much joy out of being this way. I rather compartmentalize things - I guess my brain just works better this way.

Yeah, multi-tasking spreads me so thin...I do find it much easier to compartmentalize. I know that once I'm done with this freelance project, I'll be able to open up my energy to doing something else for a bit. But on the good / bad side, business is going pretty well and I already have another project waiting for me when this one is over, a longer one which will take me a couple months to do.

So I need to get myself figured out soon here, otherwise it's going to be a few more months and I just can't check out, its my last summer with my daughter, and I want to be able to relax and spend time with her, be able to go out and do something with her. I can't spend the summer locked up in my apartment working and avoiding everything.

I also focus intently on something I am angry about but feel unsafe to bring up. So I ruminate

Ruminating is my personal evil...I can get trapped in that for weeks. And I stay angry at either the person, the situation, or myself..it runs in cycles where my anger is directed, but once the gears start rolling, its like they just won't stop.