Left Work After Half An Hour

[bekbek]

Finding that work is a massive trigger for me at the moment. I went it and thought I would be ok. After 30 mins I had to leave. I couldn't breathe and started shaking and crying. I usually last around 4 months and then the job becomes too stressful and I have to leave. I feel like such a failure and I don't know what to do at the point. My partner starts stressing out because of money and then I feel so incredibly guilty and like a massive burden . I don't know how to fix this

 

[SeanCharles]

Awww:( I am sorry that work is trigger for you. I can definitely relate and empathize also in ways, even though I don't your story as of yet. I know somewhat why I handle my job the way I do even though I am not happy with something that transpired and as a result my own schedule will be knocked back a little further.

 

[bekbek]

At the moment I am working in a call centre which, according to my psychologist, is the worst place I could be working right now. I've had GAD and panic disorder for about 6 years now and in the past couple of months I was diagnosed with PTSD. Which explained quite a lot. The amount of stress the team leaders put on us is nothing short of ridiculous. I'm full time and on the late shift which means my body clock is totally out of whack. I just don't know how to keep working at the moment because the jobs I've had seem to be too much pressure and after 4 months or so I crash hard

 

[bekbek]

Thank you for replying :)

 

[Go Hungry]

Oh holy god, I feel for you. I used to work at a call center and it was Hell on Earth. The pressure, the demands that you be a precision machine instead of a human being, the draconian rules and punishment, and most of all, most horrible of all the things; the full and complete expectation that you should act happy and grateful for the abuse. Trust me when I say, that it is not just you. T-mobile was such a monstrous place that half of my team was on anti-depressants and anxiety drugs. I needed the money too, but I would suggest trying to find an alternative as soon as possible. Nothing is worth the degradation of that sort of environment.

Though there was one bright moment. Our team was the 'trail-blazers' and they once had one of their dumb contests to see who could decorate their section with their 'theme'. We festooned the place in flame patterns, burning stars, I created a 3-foot "Number One" sign that I covered in scenes of fire and monsters (small enough that you couldn't make them out from a distance) and in great big letters, the word "BURN". The managers, when they saw it, their faces... And in a lovely reversal, THEY were the ones who had to pretend that it was all great and that everything was wonderful...

So yes, please get out of there, it's extremely unhealthy for any person.

 

[Josey]

In worked for a call center before I was diagnosed with anxiety and panic attacks. It got so bad that I would break down and hyperventilate over pushing the button to "dial in." Eventually I had to quit and I will NEVER work call center again. It was the biggest stressor ever. I would find a different job too.

 

[Bonsiren]

For four months, I worked night shift as data entry for a huge insurance exchange my home state was attempting to put together. There were two day-shift call centers at two locations that did all the customer service stuff, and we all worked off the same database. We pulled people from the call centers onto our shift to help with the workload, and they brought with them all kinds of horror stories--mostly about things they had absolutely no control over.

@bekbek I strongly recommend finding another job. If your capacity is only about four months, have you considered looking into a temp positions? There are a lot of temp agencies you can find work through, and the positions can range from a month to six months. Some are temp-to-hire, and others are just temp positions with an expected end date. I've found work through OfficeTeam, which is part of RobertHalf. OfficeTeam does a lot of basic office and administrative positions in various states. They might have an office in yours.

I know those feelings of guilt. Lately, I've started looking at self-employment because my PTSD and paranoia conflicted so strongly with my supervisors, it's made it hard to find and keep a job. There are so many positions (like call centers) that I flat-out avoid because I know I won't survive. Self-employment allows me to maintain my own hours and be my own boss. I don't have to explain triggers, migraines, or rampant paranoia to anyone. Being able to control my work environment has been a huge relief, as I often get stressed out simply at the thought of not having any control.

Self-employment takes a while to build up to and has its own stressors. It may not be the right choice for you now, but it is something to think about for the future.