Sufferer Life Isn't Much Worth Living Anymore

[Becky gard]

Thanks. I hope someday I am able to find it again too

 

[Gadgie]

Quote............"I had decided after I wrote that I wasn't gonna come back."

I did that a few months ago, I posted on my favourite ex service site, that I was going away for while, so they would know the reason why I wasn't posting.

But one bloke, who lives in Canada, had figured it out, and phoned me just as I was about to take the pills, I had planned to use?

He even called the local police, who came to see me, and stayed a while, just to make sure. That was really good of them to do that.

Now, here I am a few months later, and thanks to all the support I got on here, I'm feeling a lot better.
So, do t give up, help is out there, it's just a matter of searching for it, good luck.

 

[Annie get your gun]

Hi
I feel very alone today another night when I thought I'd behaved only to find I'd gone crazy by the end of the night. I google how to end it I've tried with pills, don't have access to a gun or the will to throw myself of a cliff but the urge to be gone is soooooo great if only to not hurt the last remaining people in my life.

 

[Becky gard]

Quote............"I had decided after I wrote that I wasn't gonna come back."

I did that a few months ag...

Perhaps what I said was misunderstood. The post in it's entirety is about being new to the website, not sure how I feel about it, and that is seems a bit impersonal. This I wasn't sure if I would be back. When I read it as you wrote it I understand how perhaps it could have been misunderstood. I do apologize if anyone felt that way by reading what I wrote.
If I decided to do something crazy I probably would just do it...and not take the time to write about it....
I say that because I wanna clear any confusion up.
My life does suck, I am miserable, but it's not at the point I have the courage to take it myself .
I appreciate your concern and I hope that you are doing ok today yourself...

 

[Gadgie]

No problem, it's easy to make mistakes, but not so easy for some folk to admit it.

 

[Becky gard]

Hi
I feel very alone today another night when I thought I'd behaved only to find I'd gone crazy by the end...

I hope that things get better for you. I'm sorry for whatever is going on. Not sure why you mean by behave. For myself if I've Mis behaved it means I've gone crazy on Facebook and say too much.
Anymore I don't care what anyone thinks. I don't talk to anyone so I talk to Facebook. I feel like a handful of people who know me well know....clearly, I am not ok, yet they choose to go on with their life and act like nothing is wrong...so right or wrong, I quit caring what they think. I don't like them very much truth be told. Being alone....truly alone...is a horrible thing. Good luck to you on this journey. On a personal note I would say to you skip pills. Suicide isn't the answer...I suppose. You could make a bad situation worse...u don't wanna turn yourself into a vegetable accidentally, or get violently Ill. Or die. Hang in.

 

[The Black Phoenix]

@Becky gard, welcome to the forum! The fact that you joined is demonstrative that part of you is still fighting to live. Don't give up.

 

[Becky gard]

I try....