Living In The Present.

[Mikayla43]

Maslow said it is the key to mental wellness. I don't know how to do that anymore. My past has been so painful that i live in fear of the future! I really want to change that. Anyone else identify?

 

[ISupportHer]

Interesting but Maslow's hierarchy of needs is something that was part of a class in Nursing. As I have not actually gone back to look at again in detail but think I've said this before here. That this is something I have considered as part of my self evaluation as a carer, since this whole PTSD thing seemed to surface. Just a feeling that as my "world" has been threatened or at least unbalanced, that some of my reactions and thinking can be explained by a "regression" of sorts. And an awareness of these kinds of things are the path to managing my own thoughts and responses to some level.

So yes Mikayla, I think there is something to your comments. Everyone is different but I hope your awareness helps unlock a door to, maybe not changing, but an ability to somehow come to ways to use it to your advantage and self understanding.

ISH

 

[Trinomial]

Everyone handles it in the way they know how.

I'm the opposite of you. I don't see past today. It makes it difficult for me to stay on any one path for long. It gets between me and other people in my life.

I am present, but I don't act on things--everything is internalized.

I think, ultimately, that there is a balance between doing and thinking, one that allows a person to think and perform actions right now, to control our own destiny--it's just a matter of staying focused.

I find meditation helps me to set my intentions into motion. I'll focus on short term goals, things that I won't get caught up on, that way I don't stagnate.

Stagnation, can occur in dwelling in the past, being present, or worrying about the future. So if you are stuck worrying about the future, try focusing on what you can do right now to ensure a better future--that way you do not stagnate, you can keep moving on with your life and your healing.

 

[kers]

Maslow said it is the key to mental wellness.

I agree with this. It is hard to do, but when I am mindful and present, I actually feel alive. The crux of PTSD, for me, is feeling stuck in the past (the awful things that happened), the future (what awful things might happen), or in a scary dissociated state (nothing is happening because I'm not really here). When I'm present, I just feel here.

 

[been there done that]

Being in the now is a huge asset to me. I had no idea what this was until I read a book called The Power of Now. I highly recommend it. There are meditation exercises in the book that have help me to be present.

One other thing relating to time past present future theme... is I went to reiki I know it may not be for everyone but the practitioner said she had never used this focus before said I need to peace from time and gave me a mantra of no past no present no future... at the end of it all I am not sure where I am but it is peaceful. I think it takes away the sense of time all things dealing with time. The above mentioned book says time is an illusion anyway in the spiritual world.

 

[anni]

It's too early to wrap my head around the whole concept of time being illusion thing, but living in the present IS wonderful when one can stay centered enough to do it. I don't always feel deserving enough of what's here so tend to ruin it for myself, of course. There seems to be an elusive but key element in this, and boy, is it worthy of further attention since it all does come down to just plain allowing oneself to be happy once in awhile-maybe eventually more than that. It's the whole point, really.

 

[Deleted member 6617]

Being present is exactly what my T and I have been working on (among other things). I very much relate to your statement Maslow. I am working hard on living in the present and find when I am able to do that I am much more stable. It has made a huge difference for me. I wish you the best in your efforts....it is worth it.

 

[Tinyflame]

I think in many ways my definition of 'being healed' would be able to live in (and manage and enjoy) the present fully. To not only not be 'haunted' but to be able to feel 'entitled' to enjoy what is good, or to not fear 'doom' is following. To have less thoughts and more joy/ awreness, to 'retain' the moment.

 

[Tinyflame]

-To have my heart 'behave' (-though that sounds ridicuolous).

 

[intothelight]

Does anyone ever feel like they are not quite in the past, present, or future? Sometimes I feel like I am straddling.

This is tough to explain, but maybe the example will make sense. For example, I can be enjoying something in the present, but some emotion from the past will creep in and poison the now. Or again, enjoying something in the now, but "knowing" because I was happy and not deserving, that something horrible will happen in the future.

I understand grounding, containment, and focus, but every time I fail, it gets harder. It is hard to reconcile what I "know" with how I "perform". Very frustrating.

 

[Tinyflame]

Yes, exactly.

 

[Grace11]

Ugh. I am dealing with this. I feel stressed and irritable when I know I should be happy or excited and then later feel a bit happy on some level. I feel sad "before" it is "time" to feel sad about things (such as someone I care about visiting and then leaving....I will cry a few hours before they leave and then not cry when they leave). It is so bizarre to me.