Must rest/sleep?

[Hope4Now]

I think this argument has been going on for three years, but in the past few weeks it has become the focus of my sessions with both my therapist and my psychiatrist. They say I must rest and stop doing things. I must sleep at night and during the day. As much as possible. I say this is impossible. I have already pared my life down to bare bones. They point to what I am doing and say it is too much.

Today my therapist confirmed that one of the main reasons they keep trying to keep me on medication is so I will slow down. My system fights that.

When I was in the hospital, there were some people very happy that they'd been given 12 mg. of Seroquel to help them sleep. I laughed inside because I was on 800 mg. of Seroquel for three months and I was still going strong (although it was a struggle) and not sleeping well. Now I'm on 900 mg. of lithium. And I AM feeling like I need to sleep, but I fight it. I have always been one of those people who go until I drop. I'm being told this may be why the fibromyalgia hit me...that my body just burned out.

Has anyone else been prescribed sleep and rest as a healing modality? Is it challenging for you? How do you convince yourself that resting is good and not being lazy, etc. How do you manage to get regular life things done while resting/sleeping all the time? I'm really struggling with this, and I would love some advice on this. Thanks!

 

[Keming]

sleep is essential for both physical and psychological health. sleep is not wasted time - it is time when the body flips to 'cellular regeneration' mode, and the nervous system refreshes the various neurochemicals we rely on to function at peak efficiency. six to eight hours of sleep is not 'sleeping all the time.' it's a necessary recharge. if the medical professionals around you are desperately trying to get you to rest, consider extending them some trust, and trying it.

 

[Hope4Now]

Yes what you are saying is what my team is telling me. Except it is not just sleeping at night. I am meant to sleep and rest during the day too, and that is very hard. I have managed to keep myself in bed through the night for several months now, but it is not enough. I appreciate your affirmation of what I'm being told.

Sleep does feel like a waste of time to me, particularly during the day when I feel I ought to be doing things. I just went to my friend's funeral. She died suddenly at age 53. This makes me feel even more that I should use my time well. But I suppose what the docs are indicating is that if I don't do the sleeping thing now and for a while, I will not survive. So argh.

 

[Hope4Now]

Ok. Yesterday and today are a perfect example of my problem. Yesterday, I went to a funeral for a friend. With the getting ready, getting there, funeral, and reception, I was away from my house from 10-2. Totally exhausted. Having minor flashbacks throughout, etc. but really felt I could not leave. Collapsed for two hours when I got home, but then had to get up to go to the birthday celebration for my husband with the family. I didn't want to miss that. So was out from 4-9:30 or so. Collapsed when I got home. Slept very fitfully and had to get up with my ailing dog middle of the night. Didn't sleep much after that. Got up today and did some reading/chatting with husband, then went to a new church I wanted to check out. Then because it is a beautiful day, I wanted to work in the garden. Fell over twice before I decided it was time to come in. Because I have to sleep a little now because am going to a really important thing tonight that is kind of far away.

So all these things feel like they need to happen (the gardening can't wait because I'm having surgery on Tuesday and will not be able to garden for 2-3 weeks). And yet, they are wiping me out. And yet if I don't do them, I feel like I have a really poor quality of life and am in danger of sliding into depression.

So I kind of have the opposite thing that happens to some people I know. They have a hard time motivating to get up and out and do things. I have a hard time not doing things. I hear what my therapy team is saying. I know they've medicated me to try to make me stop. But I just seem to keep going and can't help myself.

I just don't know anybody else who has this problem. I'm needing to find a way to talk myself into stopping. I mean, I guess the surgery will stop me for a week or so, so maybe I will get used to it but somehow I don't think so. I'm the person who persisted in entertaining a group of people while I had a baby in diapers and a shattered elbow, and who went through with a camping trip with a finger broken in three places. There is something screwy with my system that I don't understand. If it were me talking to somebody else, I'd have great advice. I just can't seem to listen to my own. I'm really struggling with this.

 

[Deadman]

I just don't know anybody else who has this problem.

Most people in your shoes probably view coming to a forum like this as not being productive enough. ;)

I once had a roommate very much like you. He never stood still the entire time I knew him. When he was stressed he pushed himself even harder. I realize now he was probably trying to escape dealing with his abusive childhood. He just kept doing more and more till he broke down mentally and physically.

 

[Hope4Now]

probably trying to escape

Yes, on my drive home tonight I came to the conclusion that this is true. When I rest, I am overrun by flashbacks. It is time for me to deal with my past. If I could only figure out how...LOL I was going to say how to do it faster. Sigh.

Thanks for the feedback.