Sufferer Mva trauma from 44 years ago. emdr questions.

[Ruby Rose]

i sought help from a psychologist 2-3 years ago as I was struggling with the demands, guilt, grief, fear of judgement , feeling responsible to blame etc related to my teenage daughter having a severe mental illness.
I found this really helpful but continued to get stuck with the fact I felt like I was responsible and to blame! My therapist suggested we try EMDR and a Trauma from when I was 5 years old surfaced. My little brother got badly injured in a car accident and I was made to feel like I was to blame because I wasn't holding him and hadn't closed the car door probably!
It has been extremely difficult to rexperience this and also the other related memories in fact some days I think that life is almost too overwhelming!!! Does anyone else feel like this doing EMDR? I have had around 8 sessions and each time following I feel exhausted and like I've been hit by a bus! I quite often will have flashbacks memories in the days between sessions these are extremely difficult to experience.
I really struggle to rate 1-10 how distressing the memories images are at the end of the session as i feel so emotional I feel like I have to rate it lower/decreased as I so want this to work But to bring up the images etc are really distressing.
If anyone has had any similar experiences or can offer any advice please share.
Thanks

 

[Friday]

I haven't done EMDR, but just wanted to take a moment to welcome you to the forums :)

 

[anonymous]

It's possible that you're getting flooded. It might be better to go slower. EMDR is exhausting and you will continue to process after your sessions. It can be a rollercoaster, but the end result is worth it.

 

[Ruby Rose]

It's possible that you're getting flooded. It might be better to go slower. EMDR is exhausting and y...

Thanks for that

 

[ladee]

welcome ! I have not had EMDR, but you can ask your T to slow down... and also hope you are telling them the difficulties you are having... sounds like you may need some time in between to learn self care and grounding... From everything I have heard, it is hard work, but very worth it in the end. Wishing you success and glad you are here..

 

[EveHarrington]

Welcome to the forum! :-)

 

[Ruby Rose]

It's possible that you're getting flooded. It might be better to go slower. EMDR is exhausting and y...

Thank you I guess until my daughter got sick I'd not really thought about my up bringing and this traumatic experience had just been tucked away for so long and now it's just seems overwhelming someday to relive it and to reflect on the implications it's maybe had on my life - just one day at a time at the moment!!

welcome ! I have not had EMDR, but you can ask your T to slow down... and also hope you are telling them...

Thank you I'm seeing her again this week so I will share this with her then.

 

[ladee]

It is very hard to know we have contributed to our kids problems.... many of us here going thru the same thing.... lots of good support and validation for a few things we did right... and learning self forgiveness... a hard one... but you are not alone in you struggles and we are glad you are here.