My Problem With Men..

[BlueDaisy]

Do you know if that feeling ever change? Or do you have to control yourself?

 

[Meadowsweet]

Do you know if that feeling ever change? Or do you have to control yourself?

I don't know daisy. At the moment I'm isolated, a big part of that is because I don't trust my judgement to keep me safe.

But I'm hoping therapy will give me the tools I need to have that control over my mind.

 

[Alina]

Must admit I have a similar problem. Me and my dad REALLY do not get along well, we never had. Differing opinions and a fierce temper from him stops us having a close relationship. I don't find boys my own age attractve, unless they look older. By older I mean anything from 20 year olds to 40 year olds. I tend to want to be noticed by teachers more than I would by any boy my own age. I find boys my own age are smaller in height to me, and feel physically smaller. They also appear younger than me and don't think the same way as I do or have to same interests, interests and ways of thinking that many older men share. I completely understand how annoying it is to feel this way, but it is only natural after what you have gone through. I myself feel as if boys my age are too immature to relate, and not strong enough to feel as if they could protect me, so I don't think it is anything to necessarily be ashamed of. Many girls feel the same way I am sure, don't worry :)

 

[crazytrain]

Alina, sorry to hear that about your relationship with your Father. It is a bummer when parents just really don't want to be parents to their children. You make me a little nervous about what sort of guys you are attracted to, though. I would be very cautious if I were you; older men usually have the same sort of stuff on their minds as younger ones do. We just have more experience playing the games in better ways. Ultimately, though, an older guy is usually attracted to younger women's bodies because they are older and feel threatened that their own youth has passed them by some how. This could very well end up hurting some one like yourself. I wouldn't want you to get even more harm to yourself! On the bright side is that not all men grow up to be bigger boys; some of us can actually grow up to be real men, with thoughts, feelings, like and dislikes. We can effectively communicate these things to other people and have a genuineness about us that is very appealing and induces comfort, and eventually real love. That is what I would like to happen for you! That's the real good stuff!

I don't know if that is you on your avatar picture, but if it is, you really should be cautious! You have a very attractive backside at least! ;)

Hope you are doing well with everything! Take good care of yourself, because you are valuable and you are really the only one to protect yourself! The rest of us here can only caution you and encourage you!

CT

 

[Alina]

You make me a little nervous about what sort of guys you are attracted to, though. I would be very cautious if I were you; older men usually have the same sort of stuff on their minds as younger ones do. We just have more experience playing the games in better ways. Ultimately, though, an older guy is usually attracted to younger women's bodies because they are older and feel threatened that their own youth has passed them by some how. This could very well end up hurting some one like yourself.
CT

It's not me, I'm interested in art, photography. I'm not that stupid. Whilst I can be attracted to older men, I'm afraid to be touched. Trust me I wouldn't be letting no one take advantage of me that way, it's hard enough having a friend hug me never mind anything else. But I know for a fact a lot of young girls get 'silly crushes' on older men, and I think that is all this is. That's all I was trying to say to BlueDaisy, that it isn't isolated, lots of girls have crushes on teachers, Thanks for the advice though, I appreciate it.

 

[crazytrain]

Thanks for the advice though, I appreciate it

You are quite welcome, and I am so glad that you do not seem offended! I have a daughter that is 19 and pregnant with her second child this year, so it always makes me nervous on a personal level! ;)

If you have a hard time with physical touch, then you hopefully won't mind a touchless hug! :hug:

All the best!
CT

 

[Alina]

You are quite welcome, and I am so glad that you do not seem offended! I have a daughter that is 19 and pregnant with her second child this year, so it always makes me nervous on a personal level! ;)

No I don't mind haha, and of course not, you are trying to help :) Believe me I am so tightly wound with school and too focused on a career to even be in a situation where there would be a risk of pregnancy. I hope your daughter is coping okay, I have a friend the same age as me and she has a kid now, she is really struggling so I understand how tough it is both on her and her family! Thanks again for the advice.

 

[Kate0506]

I found your post extremely close to heart.
I also have extreme issues with men. I myself find it impossible to trust any man with anything. I struggle in relationships and have been stalled sexually (meaning I am unable to explore my sexuality as I feel as if I am unable to say no as I have the mindset that its going to happen anyway and have to be a constant submissive) I feel as if men are going to constantly betray me though I seek the validation and approval from them.