New To The Group - Life Long Ptsd

[kheals]

Hi,

I found this site while I was looking for a solution to my eye/brain problem, I'll come back to that later, and saw that there was a lot going on. So I decided to stay.

I have been suffering from PTSD my whole life, even though I just figured it out, and even though I have very few memories of my childhood and I'm not sure what happened to start all of this. I do know that I was in an incubator as a newborn for about 6 weeks. Maybe that's what did it. I don't know. What I do know is that in the past 6 years, it's gotten worse, even though it's also in the past 6 years that I've been searching for answers and solutions. Weird...

I'd about given up hope when a naturopathic doctor sent me to get neurofeedback training. That has been great and things are really changing. Also I've been following the advice of a book called "The Language of Emotions". These two things are really making a difference in my life. But there is something I am still struggling from.

When I'm not grounded and lose my boundaries, I get overstimulated and hyper vigilant and it feels like my eyes are trying to pop out of their sockets. Once this happens, I have a hard time sleeping or doing anything. I don't know what to do to relax my eyes and this hyper vigilance. I feel energy buzzing in me. It's hard to relax.

I don't do pharmaceuticals, the most I'm willing to do is health supplements. I'm wondering if anyone has any exercises or suggestions that I can use to calm my eyes down. I work at a computer and I really need my eyes. I would appreciate any help you can give.

Peace,

-Karin

 

[TLight]

Sorry, not much advice on the eye thing, but I can say that when I'm triggered badly it feels as if my left eye is rolling upwards and backwards into my head and it's painful. I've pretty much figured out that this is a type of migraine. Saw a neurologist who looked at my brain on MRI and there are abnormal areas. He offered drugs, but like you I'd rather not add to what I'm taking.

I will say something about pharmas though. I refused for decades of horrific PTSD symptoms to take meds. I didn't sleep for years and really damaged my body and nervous system. In short, I lost about 15 years to misery because I refused to try meds.

I finally found something that gave me huge relief. I mean, from the first time I took it, it felt like a horrible dark cement block was lifted from my brain. It doesn't relieve all my symptoms, but it made a difference and I had a tiny bit of my life back. It is Seroquel and I take 75mg. I also take a small dose of Klonopin when I just can't get ahold of the anxiety and after a lifetime of it, a few hours of relief from the intensity is a GodSend.

I had one Doc say to me, who I respected a lot, say that drugs have gotten a bad rap, everything is a drug/chemical and in the end, it is quality of life that matters. It made me think a lot. Now my life is significantly better.
PTSD has chemical/biological aspects to it....these drugs can help one stay out of hospitals, and for me, saved me from suicide.

 

[Nighthawk]

Hi and welcome to the forum thanks for staying.:)

 

[kheals]

Thanks for the information Tlight, I understand that the drugs can be useful and I'll probably move to them if necessary. There are reasons why I don't want to though:

1. I have a friend who is a scientist at one of the major pharmaceutical companies and she told me that they run their tests but they don't know WHY they work. They test on a cause and effect basis, not on an actual understanding of the drug basis. Add on all the side affects and you may see why I find this scary.

2. Once you have been prescribed certain drugs, mainly psychiatric drugs, you become ineligible for insurance with the exception of insurance through your place of employment. Unless of course you can afford to pay 600-800 a month for basic insurance. I was previously on a psychiatric drug. I've been off it for 8 years. I was denied insurance. I've talked to insurance professionals and they tell me it will be another 2 years before I can qualify again. Doctors do not explain this to patients before pulling out their pads.

3. Drugs are used for maintenance and the reduction of symptoms. This goal seems to be the primary purpose of the health care system. No one is curing anything anymore. I'm not interested in maintaining my problems, I'm looking for real solutions.

Like I said, if I have to I'll go that direction. Anyway, I don't want to talk about drugs. I'm looking for a better solution.

Thanks!

-Karin

 

[intothelight]

Hi Karen,

Welcome to the PTSD Forum. I think you'll find a lot of information on this site, and the support of the members is great.

If you are looking for other ways to deal with anxiety, there is plenty of information on here. Some of the more standard ways:

1. Diet (reducing stimulants)
2. Exercise
3. Yoga
5. Aromatherapy
6. Therapy

Search under any of these and I am sure you will find something that may be of assistance.

Take care.
Debbie