that_1_girl
Confident
I have had many in my life but 2 or more nightmares about people actively trying to kill me, in the last week to ten days. Last night was the most recent. To my knowledge no one has ever actually tried to kill me or been physically violent against me beyond csa. That’s another matter entirely.
They are almost always very scary/distressing/upsetting and lately they always wake me up in some state of bad anxiety. I take Remeron (mirtazapine) and Valium (diazepam) at night now, as well as a nightmare med, that doesn’t seem to be working anymore, and several other things. So lately I tend to fall back asleep fast because Remeron + Valium knocks me the f out.
I tend to fight falling back asleep right away, though, because if I fall back asleep the same nightmare will come right back. But the meds usually win, even if I can fight it for 10 minutes or so.
Does anyone who *hasn’t* been physically assaulted and *hasn’t* been a survivor of attempted murder—but has CPTSD/PTSD from other types of abuse such as csa or adult sa (attempted or completed) and/or emotional/psychological/verbal abuse (especially systematic emotional/psychological/verbal abuse) and/or extreme (verbal/psychological) childhood bullying—or for any other non physical assault reason—have dreams like this? Is there a reason that you can discern?
***I *really* do NOT think my brain is trying to “tell me something that I previously had no memory of”…and if it is I’m not sure I want to know whatever it is trying to tell me. ***BUT if that is what has turned out to be your truth and you previously had zero memory of physical assault/abuse—then in that case, *that is your truth* and it’s *VALID* and those comments ARE welcome as well…
They are almost always very scary/distressing/upsetting and lately they always wake me up in some state of bad anxiety. I take Remeron (mirtazapine) and Valium (diazepam) at night now, as well as a nightmare med, that doesn’t seem to be working anymore, and several other things. So lately I tend to fall back asleep fast because Remeron + Valium knocks me the f out.
I tend to fight falling back asleep right away, though, because if I fall back asleep the same nightmare will come right back. But the meds usually win, even if I can fight it for 10 minutes or so.
Does anyone who *hasn’t* been physically assaulted and *hasn’t* been a survivor of attempted murder—but has CPTSD/PTSD from other types of abuse such as csa or adult sa (attempted or completed) and/or emotional/psychological/verbal abuse (especially systematic emotional/psychological/verbal abuse) and/or extreme (verbal/psychological) childhood bullying—or for any other non physical assault reason—have dreams like this? Is there a reason that you can discern?
***I *really* do NOT think my brain is trying to “tell me something that I previously had no memory of”…and if it is I’m not sure I want to know whatever it is trying to tell me. ***BUT if that is what has turned out to be your truth and you previously had zero memory of physical assault/abuse—then in that case, *that is your truth* and it’s *VALID* and those comments ARE welcome as well…