Parent Of Ptsd Sufferer

[Kay]

I am the mother of a daughter who has suffered PTSD symptoms since a date rape incident 5 years ago. I am looking for advice on how best to help her move forward.

 

[PTSD sufferer]

Hi Kay,

Welcome to the forum. You will find many carers here with great advise and support for you.

I have to say, your daughter is a very lucky girl to have you to support her. I am personally so pleased to see a mum here, taking an interest in her daughters' illness and actively looking to support her. Good on you!

As a sufferer, the onus is on us to start to face our trauma and take the steps to heal from it. Does your daughter have a trauma therapist? This is the most important factor of support in my mind. The forum is helpful, but we also need to work with a therapist to help address our specific issues, and where required, be on medication to help ease our symptoms.

By understanding PTSD, its symptoms and the reactions sufferers have, you can be great help to your daughter. There is a huge amount of information on this site for carers that should be your first point of call. There are also great tips on offer from carers and suffers alike through asking questions in the various threads. Do make use of us, we are all here to help and to learn.

In taking on the role of a carer, you must also look after yourself. It can be an emotional rollercoaster when a family member has PSTD and you will also need support. Which you will definitely find here. Feel free to vent, and discuss any concerns you might have. Your wellbeing is important too!

Much love, xxoo

 

[kimberley dawn]

Oh gosh, this hit! A mum who wants to help!!! For real?!? Then there must be hope

 

[Nighthawk]

Hi welcome to the forum:)

 

[Sazza]

Hi Kay,

Welcome to the forum, lots of advice and support on her from PTSD sufferers and supporters, so hope you find some support and information to help you support your daughter. Just to echo what has been said your daughter is very lucky to have you as you clearly want to try and help her through this. Most the work will be down to your daughter in moving forward but having your support through the rough journey will make all the difference to her,

Has you daughter had any help so far in dealing with her rape?

Sazza

 

[Helliepig]

Hi Kay,

As a sufferer, the onus is on us to start to face our trauma and take the steps to heal from it. Does your daughter have a trauma therapist? This is the most important factor of support in my mind. The forum is helpful, but we also need to work with a therapist to help address our specific issues, and where required, be on medication to help ease our symptoms.

I agree the onus has to be on her - it's her journey.Too easy for relatives to end up doing all the work!!

But if you read as much as you can, and you get some understanding, then you will be able to say the right thing at the right time or stay calm and unreactive and connected when she needs you to - something we all need in the midst of our suffering.

Good luck X

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Welcome to the forum :)

I think its wonderful that you are looking to try to help you daughter. Is she seeing a therpist?

 

[anthony]

Hi Kay, there is a one stop book for supporters and family to help a sufferer in the [DLMURL="https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/pages/book-recommendations/"]Books[/DLMURL] section, called The PTSD Relationship...

 

[pi314159]

It's so great to see a mother who wants to support her daughter. It's brought a smile to my face.

Welcome to the forum :)

 

[Deaf Global Nomad]

Hi Kay,

Welcome to the forum! My jaw dropped, as well, when I read your introduction. Good for you for providing support for your daughter. No, you cannot do the work for your daughter. However, by acknowledging what your daughter experienced you are helping her.

My mom finally came around to acknowledge my PTSD the end of spring this year, when she was diagnosed with cancer. I am not sure why the change happened, but it helps me and allows me to help her the best I can during her cancer journey.

I think that those of us who are so surprised by your involvement, Kay, is that many of the PTSDers experienced long-term abuse within the family. As an example, my mom could not acknowledge the various types of abuse without recognizing her role in my abuse. She was not an active abuser for the most part, but she has dissociated all of the situations in which she was a witness. That becomes complex within a violent household and my symptoms were there since I was an infant. Depending on how I phrase the question she can either remember details (if I ask her about what my father did) or has never seen anything like it (when I ask her from her perspective as being in the same room).

Best wishes from your and your daughter's journey!