DID Part doesn't want me to be happy

[ms spock]

@Chava reframes it in a more practical and reasonable manner. Being okay with yourself is a more reasonable goal.

Happiness is kind of more a thing that is sold on TV via advertisement. Being more realistic is a solid way to go.

Maybe find something for that part to do so it can feel okay or honour that is a protective part and is keeping you safe - so give it a job that involves safety?

 

[shimmerz]

I think for myself, going out and having fun involves an element of risk to exposure, judgement, being very visible to the eyes of others. Some of my 'parts' aren't ready for that yet.

For myself, I am still working through that most every risk equals 'my death'. My death is the lowest common denominator so to speak. So if exposure in a social situation may lead to judgement and being visible, amongst other things I may not be aware of yet, it is pretty damn difficult to throw 'fun' into that equation.

For myself, I am working on the 'everything ='s death' statement, which is clearly untrue. Then, perhaps the fun will seep back in again. I have found a sport that I do that I can manage to have some fun with..... that is a start for me.

 

[Stickler]

...I think being happy around my very unhappy parents was liable to get me screamed at or hit as a little kid.
...I'm not remembering any specific incidents, but I know I learned that my bedroom was safe territory and the rest of the house or apartment was not.

 

[ms spock]

...I think being happy around my very unhappy parents was liable to get me screamed at or hit as a little kid.

I relate to this statement.

My father would often engage in physical violence when I was playing happily with the other children. He would just lash out and then justify it that he thought we were misbehaving.